pgw.piccadillyjim-第13部分
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〃Very good; Mr。 James。〃
〃And now leave me; Bayliss; for I would be alone。 I have to make a series of difficult and exhaustive tests to ascertain whether I am still alive。〃
When the butler had gone; Jimmy adjusted the cushions; closed his eyes; and remained for a space in a state of a。 He was trying; as well as an exceedingly severe headache would permit; to recall the salient events of the previous night。 At present his memories refused to solidify。 They poured about in his brain in a fluid and formless condition; exasperating to one who sought for hard facts。
It seemed strange to Jimmy that the shadowy and inchoate vision of a bat; a fight; a brawl of some kind persisted in flitting about in the recesses of his mind; always just far enough away to elude capture。 The absurdity of the thing annoyed him。 A man has either indulged in a fight overnight or he has not indulged in a fight overnight。 There can be no middle course。 That he should be uncertain on the point was ridiculous。 Yet; try as he would; he could not be sure。 There were moments when he seemed on the very verge of settling the matter; and then some invisible person would meanly insert a red…hot corkscrew in the top of his head and begin to twist it; and this would interfere with calm thought。 He was still in a state of uncertainty when Bayliss returned; bearing healing liquids on a tray。
〃Shall I set it beside you; sir?〃
Jimmy opened one eye。
〃Indubitably。 No mean word; that; Bayliss; for the morning after。 Try it yourself next time。 Bayliss; who let me in this morning?〃
〃Let you in; sir?〃
〃Precisely。 I was out and now I am in。 Obviously I must have passed the front door somehow。 This is logic。〃
〃I fancy you let yourself in; Mr。 James; with your key。〃
〃That would seem to indicate that I was in a state of icy sobriety。 Yet; if such is the case; how is it that I can't remember whether I murdered somebody or not last night? It isn't the sort of thing your sober man would lightly forget。 Have you ever murdered anybody; Bayliss?〃
〃No; sir。〃
〃Well; if you had; you would remember it next morning?〃
〃I imagine so; Mr。 James。〃
〃Well; it's a funny thing; but I can't get rid of the impression that at some point in my researches into the night life of London yestreen I fell upon some person to whom I had never been introduced and mitted mayhem upon his person。〃
It seemed to Bayliss that the time had e to impart to Mr。 James a piece of news which he had supposed would require no imparting。 He looked down upon his young master's recumbent form with a grave miseration。 It was true that he had never been able to tell with any certainty whether Mr。 James intended the statements he made to be taken literally or not; but on the present occasion he seemed to have spoken seriously and to be genuinely at a loss to recall an episode over the printed report of which the entire domestic staff had been gloating ever since the arrival of the halfpenny morning paper to which they subscribed。
〃Do you really mean it; Mr。 James?〃 he enquired cautiously。
〃Mean what?〃
〃You have really forgotten that you were engaged in a fracas last night at the Six Hundred Club?〃
Jimmy sat up with a jerk; staring at this omniscient man。 Then the movement having caused a renewal of the operations of the red…hot corkscrew; he fell back again with a groan。
〃Was I? How on earth did you know? Why should you know all about it when I can't remember a thing? It was my fault; not yours。〃
〃There is quite a long report of it in to…day's Daily Sun; Mr。 James。〃
〃A report? In the Sun?〃
〃Half a column; Mr。 James。 Would you like me to fetch the paper? I have it in my pantry。〃
〃I should say so。 Trot a quick beat back with it。 This wants looking into。〃
Bayliss retired; to return immediately with the paper。 Jimmy took it; gazed at it; and handed it back。
〃I overestimated my powers。 It can't be done。 Have you any important duties at the moment; Bayliss?〃
〃No; sir。〃
〃Perhaps you wouldn't mind reading me the bright little excerpt; then?〃
〃Certainly; sir。〃
〃It will be good practice for you。 I am convinced I am going to be a confirmed invalid for the rest of my life; and it will be part of your job to sit at my bedside and read to me。 By the way; does the paper say who the party of the second part was? Who was the citizen with whom I went to the mat?〃
〃Lord Percy Whipple; Mr。 James。〃
〃Lord who?〃
〃Lord Percy Whipple。〃
〃Never heard of him。 Carry on; Bayliss。〃
Jimmy posed himself to listen; yawning。
CHAPTER V
THE MORNING AFTER
BAYLISS took a spectacle…case from the recesses of his costume; opened it; took out a pair of gold…rimmed glasses; dived into the jungle again; came out with a handkerchief; polished the spectacles; put them on his nose; closed the case; restored it to its original position; replaced the handkerchief; and took up the paper。 〃Why the hesitation; Bayliss? Why the coyness?〃 enquired Jimmy; lying with closed eyes。 〃Begin!〃
〃I was adjusting my glasses; sir。〃
〃All set now?〃
〃Yes; sir。 Shall I read the headlines first?〃
〃Read everything。〃
The butler cleared his throat。
〃Good Heavens; Bayliss;〃 moaned Jimmy; starting; 〃don't gargle。 Have a heart! Go on!〃
Bayliss began to read。
FRACAS IN FASHIONABLE NIGHT…CLUB
SPRIGS OF NOBILITY BRAWL
Jimmy opened his eyes; interested。
〃Am I a sprig of nobility?〃
〃It is what the paper says; sir。〃
〃We live and learn。 Carry on。〃
The butler started to clear his throat; but checked himself。
SENSATIONAL INTERNATIONAL CONTEST
BATTLING PERCY
(England)
v
CYCLONE JIM
(America)
FULL DESCRIPTION BY OUR EXPERT
Jimmy sat up。
〃Bayliss; you're indulging that distorted sense of humour of yours again。 That isn't in the paper?〃
〃Yes; sir。 Very large headlines。〃
Jimmy groaned。
〃Bayliss; I'll give you a piece of advice which may be useful to you when you grow up。 Never go about with newspaper men。 It all es back to me。 Out of pure kindness of heart I took young Bill Blake of the Sun to supper at the Six Hundred last night。 This is my reward。 I suppose he thinks it funny。 Newspaper men are a low lot; Bayliss。〃
〃Shall I go on; sir?〃
〃Most doubtless。 Let me hear all。〃
Bayliss resumed。 He was one of those readers who; whether their subject be a murder case or a funny anecdote; adopt a measured and sepulchral delivery which gives a suggestion of tragedy and horror to whatever they read。 At the church which he attended on Sundays; of which he was one of the most influential and respected members; children would turn pale and snuggle up to their mothers when Bayliss read the lessons。 Young Mr。 Blake's account of the overnight proceedings at the Six Hundred Club he rendered with a gloomy gusto more marked even than his wont。 It had a topical interest for him which urged him to extend himself。
〃At an early hour this morning; when our myriad readers were enjoying that refreshing and brain…restoring sleep so necessary to the proper appreciation of the Daily Sun at the breakfast table; one of the most interesting sporting events of the season was being pulled off at the Six Hundred Club in Regent Street; where; after three rounds of fast exchanges; James B。 Crocker; the well…known American welter…weight scrapper; succeeded in stopping Lord Percy Whipple; second son of the Duke of Devizes; better known as the Pride of Old England。 Once again the superiority of the American over the English style of boxing was demonstrated。 Battling Percy has a kind heart; but Cyclone Jim packs the punch。〃
〃The immediate cause of the encounter had to do with a disputed table; which each gladiator claimed to have engaged in advance over the telephone。〃
〃I begin to remember;〃 said Jimmy meditatively。 〃A pill with butter…coloured hair tried to jump my claim。 Honeyed words proving fruitless; I soaked him on the jaw。 It may be that I was not wholly myself。 I seem to remember an animated session at the Empire earlier in the evening; which may have impaired m