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第8部分

sk.carrie-第8部分

小说: sk.carrie 字数: 每页4000字

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(what o what o what) 
could stop the chocolates and her pimples would go down。 They always did。 She could fix her hair。 Buy pantyhose and blue and green tights。 Make little skirts and dresses from Butterick and Simplicity patterns。 The price of a bus ticket; a train ticket。 She could be; could be; could be
Alive。
She unsnapped her heavy cotton bra and let it fall。 Her breasts were milk…white; upright and smooth。 The nipples were a light coffee colour。 She ran her hands over them and a little shiver went through her。 Evil; bad; oh it was。 Momma had told her there was Something。 The Something was dangerous; ancient; unutterably evil。 It could make you Feeble。 Watch; Momma said。 It es at night。 It will make you think of the evil that goes on in parking lots and roadhouses。
But; though this was only nine…twenty in the morning; Carrie thought that the Something had e to her。 She ran her hands over her breasts
(dirtypillows) 
again; and the skin was cool but the nipples were hot and hard; and when she tweaked one it made her feel weak and dissolving。 Yes; this was the Something。
Her underpants were spotted with blood。
Suddenly she felt that she must burst into tears; scream; or rip the Something out of her body whole and; beating; crush it; kill it。
The napkin Miss Desjardin had fixed was already wilting and she changed it carefully; knowing how bad she was; how bad they were; how she hated them and herself。 Only Momma was good。 Momma had battled the Black Man and had vanquished him。 Carrie had seen it happen in a dream。 Momma had driven him out of the front door with a broom; and the Black Man had fled up Carlin Street into the night; his cloven feet striking red sparks from the cement。
Her momma had torn the Something out of herself and was pure。
Carrie hated her。
She caught a glimpse of her own face in the tiny mirror she had hung on the back of the door; a mirror with a cheap green plastic rim; good only for bing hair by。
She hated her face; her dull; stupid; bovine face; the vapid eyes; the red; shiny pimples; the nests of black heads。 She hated her face most of all。
The reflection was suddenly split by a jagged; silvery crack。 The mirror fell on the floor and shattered at her feet; leaving only the plastic ring to stare at her like a blinded eye。
From Ogilvie's Dictionary of Physic Phenomena:
Telekinesis is the ability to move objects or to cause changes in objects by force of the mind。 The phenomenon has most reliably been reported in times of crisis or in stress situations; when automobiles have been levitated from pinned bodies or debris from collapsed buildings; etc。
The phenomenon is often confused with the work of poltergeists; which are playful spirits。 It should be noted that poltergeists are astral beings of questionable reality; while telekinesis is thought to be an empiric function of the mind; possibly electrochemical in nature 。。。
When they had finished making love; as she slowly put her clothes in order in the back seat of Tommy Ross's 1963 Ford; Sue Snell found her thoughts turning back to Carrie White。
It was Friday night and Tommy (who was still looking pensively out the back window with his pants still down around his ankles; the effect was ic but oddly endearing) had taken her bowling。 That; of course; was a mutually accepted excuse。 Fornication had been on their minds from the word go。
She had been going out more or less steadily with Tommy ever since October (it was now May) and they had been lovers for only two weeks。 Seven times; she amended。 Tonight had been the seventh。 There had been no fireworks yet; no bands playing 'Stars and Stripes Forever;' but it had gotten a little better。
The first time had hurt like hell。 Her girl friends; Helen Shyres and Jeanne Gault; had both done It; and they both assured her that it only hurt for a minute … like getting a shot of penicillin … and then it was roses。 But for Sue; the first time had been like being reamed out with a hoe handle。 Tommy had confessed to her since; with a grin; that he had gotten the rubber on wrong; too。
Tonight was only the second time she had begun to feel something like pleasure; and then it was over。 Tommy had held out for as long as he could; but then it was just。。。 over。 It seemed like an awful lot of rubbing for a little warmth。
In the aftermath she felt low and melancholy; and her thoughts turned to Carrie in this light。 A wave of remorse caught her with all emotional guards down; and when Tommy turned back from the view of Brickyard Rill; she was crying。
'Hey;' he said; alarmed。 'Oh; hey。' He held her clumsily。
'It's all right;' she said still weeping。 'It's not you。 I did a not…so…good thing today。 I was just thinking of it。'
'What?' He patted the back of her neck gently。
So she found herself launching into the story of that morning's incident; hardly believing it was herself she was listening to。 Facing the thing frankly; she realized the main reason she had allowed Tommy to have her was because she was in
(love? infatuation? didn't matter results were the same)
with him; and now to put herself in this position…cohort in a nasty shower…room joke…was hardly the approved method to hook a fellow。 And Tommy was; of course; Popular。 As someone who had been Popular herself all her life; it had almost seemed written that she would meet and fall in love with someone as Popular as she。 They were almost certain to be voted King and Queen of the highschool Spring Ball; and the senior class had already voted them class couple for the yearbook。 They had bee a fixed star in the shifting firmament of the high school's relationships; the acknowledged Romeo and Juliet。 And she knew with sudden hatefulness that there was one couple like them in every white suburban high school in America。
And having something she had always longed for … a sense of place; of security; of status … she found that it carried uneasiness with it like a darker sister。 It was not the way she had conceived it。 There were dark things lumbering around their warm circle of light。 The idea that she had let him fuck her
(do you have to say it that way yes this time I do) 
simply because he was Popular; for instance。 The fact that they fit together walking; or that she could look at their reflection in a store window and think。 There goes a handsome couple。 She was quite sure
(or only hopeful)
that she wasn't that weak; not that liable to fall docilely into the placent expectations of parents; friends; and even herself。 But now there was this shower thing; where she had gone along and pitched in with high; savage glee。 The word she was avoiding was expressed To Conform; in the infinitive; and it conjured up miserable images of hair in rollers; long afternoons in front of the ironing board in front of the soap operas while hubby was off busting heavies in an anonymous Office; of joining the P。T。A。 and then the country club when their ine moved into five figures; of pills in circular yellow cases without number to insure against having to move out of the misses' size before it became absolutely necessary and against the intrusion of repulsive little strangers who shat in their pants and screamed for help at two in the morning; of fighting with desperate decorum to keep the niggers out of Kleen Korners; standing shoulder to shoulder with Terri Smith (Miss Potato Blossom of 1975) and Vicki Jones (Vice President of The Women's League); armed with signs and petitions and sweet; slightly desperate smiles。
Carrie; it was the goddamned Carrie; this was her fault。 Perhaps before today she had heard distant; circling footfalls around their lighted place; but tonight; hearing her own sordid; crummy story; she saw the actual silhouettes of all these things; and yellow eyes that glowed like flashlights in the dark。
She had already bought her prom gown。 It was blue。 It was beautiful。
'You're right;' he said when she was done。 'Bad news。 Doesn't sound a bit like you。' His face was grave and she felt a cool slice of terror。 Then he smiled…he had a very jolly smile…and the darknesss retreated a bit。 
'I kicked a kid in the slats once when he was knocked out。 Did I ever tell you about that?'
She shook her head。
'Yeah。' He rubbed his nose reminiscently and his cheek ga

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