el.angeleyes-第13部分

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prodigious　emotional　muscles　of　hers。　Miss　Emotional　Universe。　I　used　to　call　her　that　in　the　old　days。　Nothing　much　has　changed　since　then；　I　suppose；　but　us。　Well；　not　your　mother。　She　never　changes；　not　really…I　mean；　not　deep　under　the　surface。''
　The　patch　of　sunlight　illuminated　the　stone　statue　of　Diana；　a　reproduction　of　the　one　in　Mexico　City。
　Ellis　Nunn　pointed　at　it。　〃There　is　your　mother：　Diana；　the　Huntress。　Did　you　know　that　she　was　born　Diana　Leeway？　No？　I'm　not　surprised。　No　one　does。　I　can't　imagine　her　telling　you。　No　one　left　in　any　of　the　studios　now　to　recall　it；　either。　I　can't　remember　whose　idea　the　name　Laura　was。　Anyway；　the　producers　liked　the　sound　of　Laura　Nunn；　so　that's　what　she　became；　in　reality　as　well　as　on　the　screen。　Well；　as　much　as　your　mother　knows　what　reality　is。〃
　〃How　did　you　put　up　with　her　all　these　years？〃　Tori　asked。　〃You　not　only　survived；　but　thrived。〃
　〃Well；　I　don't　know　about　thriving；〃　he　said；　〃but　as　for　surviving　。　。　。〃　He　put　his　forefinger　against　his　lips；　thought　a　moment。　〃Do　you　know　the　story　of　the　Zen　Policeman？　No？　Odd；　with　all　that　time　spent　in　Japan。〃
　〃Dad…〃
　〃My　God；　Tori；　look　at　you。〃　He　only　called　her　by　her　Christian　name　when　he　was　angry　with　her。　〃You're　a　grown　woman　of　thirty…six；　and　what　do　you　have　to　show　for　it？　No　discernible　job；　let　alone　a　career。　And　as　for　starting　your　own　family…　well；　that's　something　of　a　joke；　isn't　it？　Face　it；　Tori；　you've　made　a　mess　of　everything；　and　here　you　are　standing　in　front　of　me；　while　Greg…〃　For　a　moment　he　could　not　go　on。　He　looked　apoplectic。　Then　he　seemed　to　gain　hold　of　himself。　〃You're　the　one　who　has　studied　Oriental　philosophy。　Tell　me；　why　is　it　that　Greg；　who　had　everything　going　for　him；　who　had　his　whole　life　laid　out　as　clearly　as　a　road　map；　a　career　distinguished　by…Jesus　God；　he　was　going　to　bee　one　of　the　first　two　men　to　live　in　space；　and　then　to　land　on　Mars　。　。　。　　Have　you　any　conception　of　what　that　means？〃　He　passed　a　hand　over　his　face。''Why　did　it　happen。　Tori？　Why　is　he　gone？''
　Tori　said　nothing。　What　was　there　to　say？
　〃Greg　was　destined　for　great　things；　I　knew　it　the　moment　he　was　born。''　Ellis　Nunn　seemed　drained　of　the　spasm　of　anger　that　had　gripped　him。　He　seemed　genuinely　confused。　〃Why　was　he　taken　from　us？　Your　mother　says　it's　God's　will。　Well；　if　that's　so；　then　God's　an　unforgivably　cruel　and　capricious　creature。〃
　Now　Tori　felt　the　words　ing；　she　could　not　help　herself。　〃So　that　is　what　you　think　I've　done　with　my　life：　nothing。　Well；　I'm　not　what　you　wanted　me　to　be；　an　astronaut；　stretching　the　envelope　of　space。　I'm　not　like　Greg。　You　trained　him；　he　wanted　to　be　just　what　you　wanted　him　to　be。　It　was　the　perfect　union　of　generations。　You　were　so　proud　of　him。　You　understood　what　motivated　him；　Greg　was　like　an　open　book　to　you。　But　you　couldn't　fathom　why　on　earth　I　would　want　to　go　to　Japan　to　study。　Of　course　you　couldn't。　You've　spent　all　your　adult　life　here　in　L。A。；　in　many　ways　as　far　from　global　politics　and　economics　as　Fiji。　This　is　the　original　land　of　Nod；　and　you　built　yourself　Diana's　Garden；　a　dream　within　the　dreamland　of　L。A。　Is　it　any　wonder　that　yon　have　no　conception　of　what　makes　me　tick？　'Japan；'　I　remember　you　saying。　'What　the　hell　could　be　so　damn　important　in　Japan？'　You　never　understood。　You　never　wanted　to。〃　She　shook　her　head。　〃I　must　be　such　a　disappointment　to　you。〃
　Her　father　was　studying　the　last　of　the　sunlight　as　it　slid　down　the　folds　of　Diana's　stone　robe。　He　had　that　faraway　look　on　his　face　he　sometimes　had　during　long　meetings　at　the　office；　as　if　he　were　there　only　in　body；　not　in　spirit。　It　was　a　sad　look；　as　well；　so　similar　to　the　one　she　had　caught　in　the　corners　of　Greg's　face　now　and　again　when　he　was　sure　no　one　was　watching　him。
　Tori　put　her　head　down。　Too　late　she　remembered　her　promise　to　her　mother　not　to　start　a　fight　with　her　father。　What　did　it　matter？　she　thought。　This　isn't　about　me　or　my　father…it　never　was。　It's　about　Greg。　It's　always　been　about　Greg；　and　there's　nothing　I　can　say　or　do　that　will　ever　change　it。　As　she　let　the　silence　of　the　encroaching　evening　steal　up　on　them；　she　was　aware　of　a　great　sadness　welling　up　inside　her。　She　recognized　that　she　was　angry　at　her　father；　but　also　at　herself　for　letting　him　get　to　her　again　and　again。
　She　said；　after　a　time；''Are　you　going　to　tell　me　the　story　of　the　Zen　Policeman？''
　Ellis　Nunn　nodded；　but　whether　it　was　in　simple　assent　or　in　acceptance　of　the　fragility　of　their　relationship；　she　could　not　tell。
　〃Many　centuries　ago；〃　he　began；　〃there　was　a　young　Buddhist　priest　who　traveled　to　Tibet　in　order　to　further　his　understanding　of　religion　and　philosophy。
　〃He　possessed　the　proper　credentials　as　well　as　a　letter　of　introduction　from　his　superior　at　his　temple　in　central　China。　When；　at　length；　he　came　upon　the　monastery　he　was　searching　for；　he　had　climbed　so　high　he　felt　as　if　he　had　breached　the　very　vault　of　heaven；　and　it　took　him　some　time　before　he　was　able　to　adapt　his　breathing　to　this　dizzying　height。
　〃In　due　course　he　was　accepted　into　the　monastery；　but　it　was　some　days　before　he　was　summoned　to　the　presence　of　the　high　lama。　The　old；　wizened　man　looked　three　hundred　years　old。
　〃　'I　understand　that　though　you　are　a　priest　you　do　not　believe　that　your　spiritual　education　is　plete。'
　〃　'That　is　correct；　sir；'　the　young　priest　said　in　a　somewhat　overawed　voice。
　〃　'What　is　it　you　seek　to　learn　here？'　the　old　lama　asked。
　〃　'Why；　all　there　is　to　learn；'　the　young　priest　said　immediately。
　〃The　old　lama　looked　at　him　and　smiled。　'We　shall　see；'　he　said。　'In　the　meantime；　we　require　you　to　remain　awake　and　on　guard　during　the　night。'
　〃The　young　priest　looked　confused。　'It　took　me　two　months　to　reach　here。　I　know　how　remote　this　monastery　is。　How　could　you　have　enemies　here？'
　〃　'The　monk　who　brought　you　to　this　chamber　will　tell　you　where　you　must　sit　tonight；'　the　lama　said。
　〃　'But　I　am　a　priest；　not　a　guard；'　the　young　man　protested。　'Besides；　I　am　a　Buddhist。　I　have　pledged　never　to　harm　a　single　creature。　I　cannot　even　till　the　earth　for　fear　of　killing　a　worm　or　an　insect。'
　〃　'You　do　not　yet　know　who　or　what　you　are；'　the　old　lama　said。　'That　is　why　you　are　here。'
　〃That　night；　the　young　priest　was　shown　to　the　spot　in　the　exact　center　of　the　monastery　where　he　must　keep　watch。　A　pillow　was　placed　for　him　to　sit。　It　was　a　crossing　of　the　four　main　corridors　of　the　stone　structure；　and　from　his　vantage　point　he　could　see　most；　if　not　all；　the　monks'　tiny　sleeping　cells。
　〃The　hours　of　the　night　crept　by　with　agonizing　slowness。　Nothing　happened。　The　silence　became　a　weight　on　the　young　priest's　eyelids；　so　that　once　or　twice　he　found　himself　drifting　off　into　a　light　slumber　before　starting　awake。　He　yawned　and　stretched　to　keep　himself　alert。　He　began　to　wonder　why　he　had　e　here；　or　if　he　had　e　to　the　right　place　at　all。
　〃Then；　all　at　once；　he　stood　up。　He　looked　from　corridor　to　corridor；　sure　that　he　had　heard　a　sound。　But　there　was　only　the　heavy　awful　silence；　claustrophobic　as　the　inside　of　a　tomb。　Then　he　became　aware　that　the　'sound'　was　an　ethereal　stirring；　as　if　in　his　own　mind；　and　he　whirled　around。
　〃He　was　not　alone。　Something　was　in　the　west　corridor。　It　came　toward　him　but；　in　the　flickering　light　of　the　reed　torches；　he　could　not　make　out　what　it　was。
　〃Suddenly；　it　burst　out　of　the　corridor；　ing　upon　him　like　a　whirlwind；　and　he　felt　a　chill　race　down　his　spine。　It　was　as　translucent　as　the　wings　of　an　insect；　he　could　clearly　see　the　corridor　behind　it；　through　it。
　〃The　wraith　brushed　past　him；　careening　down　another　corridor。　Soon　the　intersection　where　the　young　priest　now　stood　was　thick　with　these　wraiths。　Sometimes　it　seemed　to　him　that　they　had　faces；　bodies；　hands　and　feet。　At　other　times　they　were　nothing　more　than　pure　energy。
　〃The　young　priest　felt　a　fright　welling　up　inside　of　him。　What　were　these　forms？　Were　they　the　enemies　of　the　Tibetan　monks？　If　so；　how　was　he　to　bat　them；　when　violence　was　anathema　to　him？　These　questions　and　ten　thousand　others　crowded　his　mind　in　the　same　way　the　wraiths　crowded　the　corridors　of　the　monastery。