cpatricia.blacknotice-第15部分

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　　〃The　one　in　prison　for　murdering　her　husband　right　after　she　took　out　a　million…dollar　fife　insurance　policy　on　him。〃
　　〃Oh；　that　one；〃　I　said。
　　I　slipped　off　my　suit　jacket　as　I　walked　into　my　office　_　and　set　my　briefcase　on　the　floor。
　　〃Why　is　Marino　looking　for　me？〃　I　asked　again。
　　Rose　didn't　answer。　I　had　noticed　she　was　getting　hard　of　hearing；　and　every　reminder　of　her　encroaching　frailties　frightened　me。　Lput　the　death　certificates　on　top　of　a　stack　of　about　a　hundred　others　I　hadn't　gotten　around　to　reviewing　yet　and　draped　my　suit　jacket　over　my　chair。
　　〃Point　is；〃　Rose　loudly　said；　〃she's　since　sent　you　another　letter。　This　time　accusing　you　of　racketeering。〃
　　I　retrieved　my　lab　coat　from　the　back　of　the　door。
　　〃She　claims　you　conspired　with　the　insurance　pany　and　changed　her　husband's　manner　of　death　from　accident　to　homicide　so　they　wouldn't　have　to　pay　out　the　money。　And　for　this　you　got　quite　a　large　kickback；　which　is…according　to　her…how　you　can　afford　your　Mercedes　and　expensive　suits。〃
　　I　threw　my　lab　coat　over　my　shoulders　and　pushed　my　arms　through　the　sleeves。
　　〃You　know；　I　can't　keep　up　with　the　crazies　anymore；　Dr。　Scarpetta。　Some　of　them　really　frighten　me；　and　I　think　the　Internet　is　making　all　of　it　worse。〃
　　Rose　peeked　around　the　doorway。
　　〃You　aren't　listening　to　a　word　I'm　saying；〃　she　said。
　　〃I　get　suits　on　sale；〃　I　replied。　〃And　you　blame　everything　on　the　Internet。〃
　　I　probably　wouldn't　bother　shopping　for　clothes　at　all　if　Rose　didn't　force　me　out　the　door　every　now　and　then　when　stores　were　clearing　out　last　season's　styles。　I　hated　shopping；　unless　it　was　for　good　wine　or　food。　I　hated　crowds。　I　hated　malls。　Rose　hated　the　Internet　and　believed　the　world　would　end　one　day　because　of　it。　I'd　had　to　force　her　to　use　e…mail。
　　〃If　Lucy　calls；　will　you　make　sure　I　get　it　no　matter　where　I　am？〃　I　said　as　Marino　walked　into　Rose's　office。　〃And　try　her　field　office；　too。　You　can　patch　her　through。〃
　　The　thought　of　Lucy　knotted　my　stomach。　I'd　lost　my　temper　and　hurled　words　at　her　I　didn't　mean。　Rose　glanced　at　me。　Somehow　she　knew。
　　〃Captain；〃　she　said　to　Marino；　〃you　look　mighty　spiffy　this　morning。〃
　　Marino　grunted。　Glass　rattled　as　he　opened　a　jar　of　lemon　drops　on　her　desk　and　helped　himself。
　　〃What　do　you　want　me　to　do　with　this　crazy　lady's　letter？〃　Rose　peered　through　the　open　doorway　at　me；　reading　glasses　perched　on　her　nose　as　she　dug　through　another　drawer。
　　〃I　think　it's　time　we　forward　the　lady's　file…if　you　ever　find　it　to　the　A。G。's　office；〃　I　said。　〃In　case　she　sues。　Which　will　probably　lie　next。　Good　morning；
　　Marino。〃
　　〃You　still　talking　about　that　nutcake　I　locked　up？〃　he　asked；　sucking　candy。
　　〃That's　right；〃　I　remembered。　〃That　nutcake　was　one　of　your　cases。〃
　　〃So　I　guess　I'll　get　sued；　too。〃
　　〃Probably；〃　I　muttered　as　I　stood　at　my　desk；　shuffling　through　yesterday's　telephone　messages。　〃Why　does　everybody　call　when　I'm　not　here？〃
　　〃I'm　kinda　getting　into　being　sued；〃　Marino　said。　〃Makes　me　feel　special。〃
　　〃I　just　can't　get　used　to　you　in　uniform；　Captain　Marino；〃　Rose　said。　〃Should　I　salute？〃
　　〃Don't　turn　me　on；　Rose：'
　　〃I　thought　your　shift　didn't　start　until　three；〃　I　said。
　　〃Nice　thing　about　me　being　sued　is　the　city's　gotta　pay。　Ha。　Ha。　Screw　'em。〃
　　〃We'll　see　how　Ha　Ha　it　is　when　you　end　up　paying　one　of　these　days　and　lose　your　truck　and　aboveground　swimming　pool。　Or　all　those　Christmas　decorations　and　extra　fuse　boxes；　God　forbid；〃　Rose　told　him　as　I　opened　and　shut　my　desk　drawers。
　　〃Has　anybody　seen　my　pens？〃　I　asked。　〃I　don't　have　a　single　goddamn　pen。　Rose？　Those　Pilot　rolling　ball　pens。　I　had　at　least　a　box　of　them　on　Friday。　I　know　I　did　because　I　bought　them　myself　last　time　I　was　at　Ukrops。　And　I　don't　believe　it。　My　Waterman's　missing；　too！〃
　　〃Don't　say　I　didn't　warn　you　about　leaving　anything　valuable　around　here；〃　Rose　told　me。
　　〃I　gotta　smoke；〃　Marino　said　to　me。　〃I've　had　it　with　these　damn　smoke…free　buildings。　All　these　dead　people　in　your　joint　and　the　state's　worried　about　smoking。　What　about　all　those　formalin　fumes？　A　few　good　whiffs　of　that　will　drop　a　horse。〃
　　〃Damn！〃　I　shoved　one　drawer　shut　and　yanked　open　another。　〃And　guess　what　else？　No　Advil；　no　BC　powders　…and　no　Sudafed。　Now　I'm　really　getting　angry。〃
　　〃Coffee　money；　Cleta's　portable　phone；　lunches；　and　now　your　pens　and　aspirin。　I've　gotten　to　where　I　take　my　pocketbook　everywhere　I　go。　The　office's　started　calling　whoever　it　is　‘The　Body　Snatcher；'　〃　Rose　angrily　said。　〃Which　I　don't　think　is　funny　in　the　least。〃
　　Marino　walked　over　and　put　his　arm　around　her。
　　〃Sweetheart；　you　can't　blame　a　guy　for　wanting　to　snatch　your　body；〃　he　sweetly　said　in　her　ear。　〃I've　been　wanting　to　ever　since　I　first　laid　eyes　on　you　way　back　when　I　had　to　teach　the　doc　everything　she　knows。〃
　　Rose　demurely　pecked　his　cheek　and　leaned　her　head　against　his　shoulder。　She　looked　defeated　and　suddenly　very　old。
　　〃I'm　tired；　Captain；〃　Rose　muttered。
　　〃Me　too；　sweetheart。　Me；　too。〃
　　I　looked　at　my　watch。
　　〃Rose；　please　tell　everyone　staff　conference's　going　to　be　a　few　minutes　late。　Marino；　let's　talk。〃
　　The　smoking　room　was　a　corner　in　the　bay　where　there　were　two　chairs；　a　Coke　machine　and　a　dirty；　dented　ashcan　that　Marino　and　I　put　between　us。　Both　of　us　lit　up；　and　I　felt　the　same　old　bite　of　shame。
　　〃Why　are　you　here？〃　I　asked。　〃Didn't　you　cause　enough　problems　for　yourself　yesterday？〃
　　〃I　was　thinking　about　what　Lucy　said　last　night；〃　Marino　said。　〃About　my　current　situation；　you　know。　How　it's　like　I'm　hitting　the　bricks；　out　of　service；　finished；　Doc。　I　can't　take　it；　if　you　want　to　know　the　truth。　I'm　a　detective。　I've　been　one　almost　all　my　life。　I　can't　do　this　uniform　shit。　I　can't　work　for　assholes　like　Diane　‘Donkey'　Bray。〃
　　〃That's　why　you　took　the　field　investigation　exam　last　year；〃　I　reminded　him。　〃You　don't　have　to　stay　with　the　police　department；　Marino。　Not　with　any　police　department。　You've　got　more　than　enough　years　in　to　retire。　You　can　make　your　own　rules。〃
　　〃No　offense；　Doc；　but　I　don't　want　to　work　for　you；　either；〃　he　said。　〃Not　part…time　or　on　a　case　basis　or　whatever。〃
　　The　state　had　given　me　two　slots　for　field　investigators；　and　I　had　not　filled　either　one　of　them　yet。
　　〃The　point　is；　you　have　options；〃　I　replied；　touched　by　hurt　I　would　not　show。
　　He　was　silent。　Benton　walked　into　my　mind　and　I　saw　his　feelings　in　his　eyes；　and　then　he　was　gone。　I　felt　the　cooling　shadow　of　Rose　and　feared　the　loss　of　Lucy。　I　thought　of　getting　old　and　people　vanishing　from　my　life。
　　〃Don't　quit　on　me；　Marino；〃　I　told　him。
　　He　didn't　answer　me　right　away；　and　when　he　did；　his　eyes　blazed。
　　〃Fuck　'em　all；　Doc；〃　he　said。　〃No　one's　telling　me　what　to　do。　If　I　want　to　work　a　case；　I'll　goddamn　work　it。〃
　　He　tapped　an　ash　and　seemed　very　pleased　with　himself。
　　〃I　don't　want　you　fired　or　demoted；〃　I　said。
　　〃They　can't　demote　me　no　lower　than　I　am；〃　he　said　with　another　lightning　bolt　of　anger。　〃They　can't　make　me　less　than　a　captain；　and　there's　no　assignment　worse　than　I　got。　And　let　'em　fire　me。　But　guess　what？　They　won't。　And　you　want　to　know　why？　Because　I　could　go　to　Henrico；　Chesterfield；　Hanover；　you　name　it。　You　don't　know　how　many　times　I've　been　asked　to　take　over　investigations　in　other　departments。〃
　　I　remembered　the　unlit　cigarette　in　my　hand。
　　〃A　few　of　'em　have　even　wanted　me　to　be　chief。〃　He　hobbled　further　along　his　Pollyanna　path。
　　〃Don't　fool　yourself；〃　I　said　as　menthol　made　its　hit。　〃Oh；　God；　I　can't　believe　I'm　doing　this　again〃
　　〃I'm　not　trying　to　fool　anyone；〃　he　said；　and　I　could　feel　his　depression　moving　in　like　a　low…pressure　front。　〃It's　like　I'm　on　the　wrong　planet。　I　don't　know　the　Brays　and　Andersons　of　the　world。　Who　are　these　women？〃
　　〃Power　gluttons。〃
　　〃You're　powerful。　You're　a　hell　of　a　lot　more　powerful　than　them　or　anybody　I　ever　met；　including　most　men；　and　you　aren't　like　that。〃
　　〃I　don't　feel　very　powerful　these　days。　I　couldn't　even　control　my　temper　this　morning　on　my　own　driveway　in　front　of　my　niece　and　her　girlfrie