cb.coldheart canyon-第44部分

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　kid；　and…〃
　 〃I'm　not　fucking　anybody；　Todd。〃
　 〃You　fucked　me。〃
　 〃Twice。　A　long　time　ago。　I　wouldn't　do　it　today。〃
　 〃Well　just　for　the　record　neither　would　I。〃
　 Maxine　looked　at　him　coldly。　〃That's　it。　I've　said　what　I　needed　to　say。〃
　 She　went　to　the　door。　Todd　called　after　her。　〃Why　do　it　to　me　now？　Why　wait　till　I'm　so　fucking　tired　I　can　hardly　think　straight！〃　His　voice　continued　to　get　louder；　creeping　up　word　on　word；　syllable　on　syllable。　〃And　then　screw　me　up　like　this？〃
　 〃Don't　worry；　I'll　find　somebody　else　to　look　after　you。　I'll　train　them。　You'll　be　taken　good　care　of。　It's　not　like　I'm　walking　out　on　you。〃
　 〃Yes　you　are。〃
　 He　turned　to　look　at　her；　finally。　The　blood　had　rushed　to　the　surface　of　his　half…mended　face。　It　was　grotesquely　red。
　 〃You　think　I'm　finished；　so　you're　leaving　me　to　be　crucified　by　every　piece　of　shit　journalist　in　the　fucking　country。〃
　 Maxine　ignored　the　outburst；　and　picked　up　what　she　was　saying。　〃I'll　find　somebody　to　take　over；　who'll　protect　you　better　than　I　can。　Because　I'm　just　as　tired　as　you　are；　Todd。　Then　I'm　going　to　have　one　last　party　down　at　the　beach…house；　and　get　the　hell　out　of　this　city　before　it　kills　me。〃
　 〃Well　I'm　not　going　to　let　you　go。〃
　 〃Oh；　now　don't　start　threatening…〃
　 〃I'm　not　starting　anything。　I'm　just　reminding　you。　We've　got　a　contract。　I'm　not　going　to　allow　you　to　make　a　fortune　out　of　me　and　then　just　walk　away　when　things　get　difficult。　You　owe　me。〃
　 〃I　what？〃
　 〃Whatever's　on　the　contract。　Another　two　years。〃
　 〃I　can't　do　it。　I　won't　do　it。〃
　 〃Then　I'll　sue　your　ass；　for　every　fucking　cent　you　earned　off　me。〃
　 〃You　can　try。〃
　 〃And　I'll　win。〃
　 〃Like　I　said；　you　can　try。　If　you　want　all　our　dirty　washing　dragged　out　for　everyone　to　see；　then　do　it。　I　guarantee　you'll　e　out　looking　worse　than　I　will。　I've　covered　for　you　so　many　times；　Todd。〃
　 〃And　you　signed　a　confidentiality　agreement。　If　you　break　it；　I'll　sue　you　for　breaking　that；　too。〃
　 〃Who　cares？　Nobody　gives　a　rat's　ass　about　me。　I'm　just　a　professional　parasite。　You're　the　movie　star。　You're　the　all…American　boy。　The　one　with　the　reputation　to　lose。〃　She　paused。　Then　murmured；　almost　ruminatively：　〃The　tales　I　could　tell。。。〃
　 〃I　can　tell　just　as　many。〃
　 〃There's　nothing　anyone　can　call　me　that　I　haven't　been　called　a　hundred　times。　I　know　everyone　says　I'm　a　cunt。　That's　what　they　say　right？　'How　can　you　work　with　that　fucking　cunt？'　If　I　have　to　hear　it　in　a　courtroom　one　more　time；　I　can　take　that；　as　long　as　when　it's　all　over　I　don't　have　to　hear　your　whining　and　plaining　any　more。〃
　 〃Okay；〃　Todd　said。　〃If　that's　the　way　you　want　to　play　it。〃
　 Maxine　headed　for　the　door。　〃For　your　information；〃　she　said；　〃I　could　go　down　to　LAX　right　now；　and　I　could　fill　a　limo　with　kids　who　have　ten　times　your　talent。　They're　all　ing　here；　looking　to　be　the　next　Tom　Cruise；　the　next　Leonardo　DiCaprio；　the　next　Todd　Pickett。　Pretty　boys　with　tight　asses　and　nice　abs　who'll　end　up；　most　of'em；　selling　their　tight　asses　on　Santa　Monica　Boulevard。　The　lucky　ones'll　end　up　waiters。〃
　 〃If　I　wanted　to；　I　could　make　any　one　of　them　a　moviestar。　Maybe　not　a　star　like　you。　But　then　again　maybe　bigger。　Right　face；　right　time；　right　movie。　Some　of　it's　luck；　some　of　it's　salesmanship。　The　point　is；　I　sold　you；　Todd。　I　told　people　you　were　going　to　be　huge；　and　I　said　it　so　often　that　it　became　the　truth。　And　you　were　so　sweet　back　then。　So。。。natural。　You　were　the　boy　next　door；　and　yes…for　your　information…I　was　a　little　in　love　with　you；　like　everyone　else。　But　it　didn't　last　long。　You　changed。　I　changed。　We　both　got　rich。　We　both　got　greedy。〃　She　put　her　hand　to　her　mouth；　and　gently　passed　her　fingers　over　her　lips。　〃But　you　know　what；　Todd？　Neither　of　us　was　ever　happy。　Am　I　right？　You　were　never　happy；　even　when　you　had　everything　you'd　every　dreamed　of　wanting。〃
　 〃What's　your　point？〃
　 〃I　don't　know　what　the　point　is；〃　she　said　softly。　〃I　guess　that's　the　problem　in　a　nutshell；　isn't　it？　I　don't　know　what　the　point　is。〃　She　stared　into　middle　distance　for　a　while。　〃You'll　be　fine；　Todd；〃　she　said　finally。　〃Things　will　work　out　better　without　me；　you'll　see。　I'll　find　someone　to　take　care　of　you；　Eppstadt'll　find　a　movie　for　you；　and　you'll　be　back　in　front　of　the　cameras　in　a　few　months；　looking　perfect。　If　that's　what　you　want。〃
　 〃Why　wouldn't　I　want　that？〃　he　said　to　her。
　 She　looked　at　him　wearily。　〃Maybe　because　none　of　it's　worth　a　damn。〃
　 He　knew　he　had　a　riposte　for　that；　he　just　couldn't　figure　out　what　it　was　at　that　particular　moment。　And　while　he　was　trying　to　figure　it　out；　Maxine　turned　her　back　on　him　and　walked　out。
　
　 He　let　her　go。　What　was　the　use　of　a　feud？　That　was　for　the　lawyers。　Besides；　he　had　more　urgent　business　than　trading　insults　with　her。　He　had　to　find　Katya。
　 The　afternoon　sun　was　not　just　warm；　it　was　hot；　and　the　foliage　was　busy　with　hungry　hummingbirds　and　the　canyon　was　quiet　and　perfect。　He　threaded　his　way　through　the　overgrown　bushes；　past　the　tennis　courts　and　the　antique　sundial；　up　towards　the　guest…house。　The　gradient　became　quite　steep　after　a　time；　the　narrow　steps　decayed　by　time　and　neglect；　so　that　in　some　spots　they'd　collapsed　pletely。　After　a　while；　he　realized　the　path　had　divided　at　some　earlier　point；　and　that　he'd　taken　the　wrong　turning。　The　mistake　took　him　on　a　picturesque　tour　of　the　gardens'　hidden　places；　bringing　him　first　to　a　small　grove　of　walnut　trees；　in　the　middle　of　which　stood　a　large　gazebo　in　an　advanced　state　of　disrepair；　and　then　into　a　garden　within　a　garden；　bounded　by　an　unkempt　privet　hedge。　Here　there　were　roses；　or　rather　the　remains　of　last　year's　blooms；　the　bushes　fighting　for　space；　and　strangling　each　other　in　the　process。　There　was　no　way　through　the　thorny　tangle　to　pick　up　the　path　on　the　other　side；　so　he　was　obliged　to　try　and　get　around　the　garden　from　the　outside；　staying　close　to　the　hedge。　It　was　difficult　to　do。　Though　the　plants　he　was　striding　through　didn't　have　thorns；　they　were　still　unruly　and　wild；　twigs　and　dead　flowers　scraped　at　his　face；　his　shirt　was　quickly　soiled；　his　sneakers　filled　with　stony　dirt。　By　the　time　he　got　to　the　other　side　of　the　garden；　and　took　to　the　path　again；　he　was　short　of　breath　and　patience；　and　had　two　dozen　little　nicks　and　scratches　to　call　his　own。
　 His　wanderings　had　brought　him　to　a　spot　that　offered　a　spectacular　view。　He　could　see　the　big　house　below　him　surrounded　by　palms　and　Birds　of　Paradise；　he　could　see　the　baroque　weathervane　on　the　top　of　the　gazebo　he'd　passed　on　his　way　here；　and　the　orchid　house；　which　he　had　e　upon　on　one　of　his　earlier　trips　around　the　garden。　All　this；　bathed　in　clear　warm　California　light；　the　crystalline　light　which　had　brought　filmmakers　here　almost　a　century　before。　Not　for　the　first　time　since　ing　to　the　house　he　had　a　pleasurable　sense　of　history；　and　a　measure　of　curiosity　as　to　the　people　who　might　once　have　walked　here；　talked　here。　What　ambitions　had　they　plotted；　as　they　ambled　through　these　gardens？　Had　they　been　sophisticates；　or　simpletons？　What　little　he　knew　about　Old　Hollywood　he'd　heard　from　Jerry　Brahms；　which　meant　he'd　only　ever　really　been　half…listening。　But　he　knew　enough　to　be　certain　those　times　had　been　good；　at　least　for　a　man　like　himself。　Douglas　Fairbanks　and　Rudolph　Valentino；　Charlie　Chaplin；　the　Barrymore　clan；　and　all　the　rest　had　been　like　royalty；　lording　it　over　their　new　dominion　in　the　West。　A　bean…counting　prick　like　Eppstadt…with　his　demographics　and　his　endless　corporate　maneuvering…would　have　had　no　power　in　the　world　this　canyon　still　preserved。
　 Having　caught　his　breath；　he　now　continued　his　ascent。　The　shrubbery　became　denser　the　closer　he　got　to　the　guest…house。　He　would　have　needed　a　machete　to　hack　through　it　efficiently；　but；　lacking　one；　had　to　do　with　a　branch　he　picked　up　on　his　way。　The　flowers　gave　up　their　perfume　as　he　beat　his　way　through　them；　and　he　recognized　their　scent。　It　was　her　scent。　The　scent　on　Katya's　skin。　Did　she　walk　naked　amongst　them；　he　wondered；　pressing　the　flowers　against　her　body？　Now　that　would　be　a　sight　to　see。
　 The　thought　of　this　had　stirred　him