lh.narcissusinchains-第126部分

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　to　the　room。　Gretchen　didn't　e　bounding　out　and　eat　anybody；　and　I　let　out　a　breath　I　hadn't　known　I　was　holding。
　Jason　stayed　there；　gazing　down；　unmoving；　hands　frozen　on　the　lid。　He　finally　turned　towards　the　rest　of　us；　and　there　was　a　look　on　his　face　that　I'd　never　seen。　It　was　a　mixture　of　horror　and　pity。　His　spring　blue　eyes　were　wide；　and　there　was　a　glitter　of　tears；　I　thought。　Jason　and　Gretchen　hadn't　been　close。　The　reaction　couldn't　be　personal。　What　was　in　that　coffin　to　put　that　look　on　Jason's　face？
　I　was　moving　forward　without　realizing　it。　〃Ma　petite；　do　not　go　closer。〃
　I　looked　at　him。　〃What's　the　matter　with　her？　Why　does　Jason　look　so　。。。　stricken？〃
　Jason　answered；　〃I've　never　seen　anything　like　this。〃
　I　had　to　see　now；　I　had　to。　I　kept　walking　towards　the　coffin。　Jean…Claude　met　me；　blocked　my　path。　〃Please；　ma　petite；　do　not　go　closer。〃
　〃I'm　supposed　to　watch　the　process；　right？　I'm　going　to　have　to　see　what　she　looks　like　sooner　or　later；　Jean…Claude。　Might　as　well　be　sooner。〃
　He　studied　my　face；　as　if　he'd　memorize　it。　〃I　did　not　anticipate　that　she　would　be　so　。。。　〃　He　shook　his　head。　〃You　will　not　be　happy　with　me　after　you　see　her。〃
　〃You　don't　know　what　she　looks　like　either；〃　I　said。
　〃No；　but　Jason's　reaction　tells　me　many　things　I　do　not　wish　to　know。〃
　〃What's　that　supposed　to　mean？〃
　He　just　stepped　aside。　〃Gaze　upon　her；　ma　petite；　and　when　you　have　forgiven　me；　e　back　to　me。〃
　Forgiven　him？　I　did　not　like　the　phrasing。　I'd　been　scared　of　Gretchen　pouncing　out　and　trying　to　kill　me；　now　I　was　more　frightened　of　looking　at　her；　of　what　horror　awaited　me　inside　that　coffin。　My　pulse　was　trying　to　climb　out　my　throat；　and　I　couldn't　breathe　past　it。　Jason's　face；　Jean…Claude's　sorrow；　and　the　utter　stillness　from　the　coffin　had　left　me　so　scared　my　mouth　was　dry。
　Jason　moved　to　one　side；　turning　away　from　the　coffin；　leaning　his　butt　against　it；　arms　hugging　his　sides。　He　looked　pale　and　ill。　I　wondered　if　he'd　changed　his　mind　about　letting　Gretchen　touch　him。
　I　stood　just　far　enough　back　that　I　couldn't　see　into　the　coffin。　I　didn't　want　to　see　something　so　horrible　that　it　made　Jason　pale。　I　didn't　want　to　see　it；　but　I　had　to。
　I　stepped　up　to　the　coffin；　like　stepping　up　to　the　plate；　knowing　that　the　ball　ing　at　you　is　going　a　hundred…plus　miles　an　hour　and　you　have　no　chance　to　swing。　My　eyes　couldn't　make　sense　of　what　I　saw　at　first。　My　mind　simply　refused　to　understand。　It's　a　safety　feature　that　we　all　have。　If　something　is　too　horrendous；　sometimes　our　brain　just　says；　nope；　not　going　to　see　this；　not　going　to　record　this；　nope；　it　would　break　us。　But　if　you　stare　long　enough；　the　mind　says；　well　damn；　we're　not　turning　away；　and　finally；　finally；　you'll　see　it；　and　once　you　see　it；　you'll　never　be　able　to　unsee　it。
　It　lay　against　white　satin　so　that　the　dry；　brown　color　was　very　stark；　painfully　outlined。　It　looked　like　a　wizened　mummy；　one　of　those　bodies　they　find　every　once　in　a　while　in　the　desert；　where　the　dryness　makes　natural　mummies。　The　brown　skin　had　molded　to　the　bones；　there　was　no　muscle　under　it；　just　bones　and　skin。　The　mouth　was　open　wide；　as　if　the　jaw　hinge　had　broken。　The　fangs　were　dry；　but　white　like　a　skull。　The　entire　head　had　dried　down　to　just　the　skull　covered　by　a　light　coating　of　brown　skin。　Patches　of　bright　blond　hair　clung　to　that　skull；　and　the　bright　color　made　it　worse；　more　obscene　somehow。　The　eyes　opened。　I　jumped；　but　the　eyes　that　stared　back　at　me　were　filled　with　something　brown　and　dried；　like　big　raisins。　They　blinked　once；　slowly；　and　a　sound　like　wind　sighing　came　out　of　the　mouth。
　I　fell　back　from　the　coffin；　fell　to　my　knees。　Jason　grabbed　my　arm；　drew　me　to　my　feet。　I　shook　his　hand　off　and　went　for　Jean…Claude。　He　stood　there；　face　patient；　empty。　I　hit　him　without　ever　breaking　stride。　Maybe　he　expected　me　to　stop；　take　a　stance；　but　I　hit　him　in　the　face；　closed　fist；　like　it　was　a　continuation　of　the　movement　of　my　body。　I　twisted　my　fist　　my　whole　body　　into　it；　and　he　was　suddenly　on　the　floor；　looking　up　at　me；　with　blood　on　his　face。
　
　55
　
　〃YOU　BASTARD；　YOU　fed　off　her　energy　while　she　was　in　there。〃　I　had　to　stalk　away　from　him　to　keep　from　kicking　him。　Some　things　you　did　not　do；　some　lines　you　did　not　cross。
　He　touched　the　back　of　his　hand　to　his　mouth。　〃What　if　I　had　nothing　to　do　with　it？〃
　〃What　if？〃　I　came　to　stand　over　him。　〃What　if？　Are　you　really　going　to　try　and　tell　me　that　you　didn't　feed　off　of　her？〃　I　pointed　back　towards　the　coffin　and　must　have　glanced　back；　because　the　next　thing　I　knew　he　had　my　legs；　and　I　was　suddenly　falling　towards　the　ground。　I　slapped　the　hard　stones　with　my　arms　like　I'd　been　taught　in　Judo。　That　took　some　of　the　impact；　kept　my　head　from　hitting　the　stone　floor；　but　it　took　concentration。　By　the　time　my　body　hit　the　ground；　Jean…Claude　was　on　top　of　me；　pinning　my　arms　to　the　floor　with　his　forearms；　the　rest　of　his　body　trapping　the　rest　of　mine。
　〃Get　off　of　me。〃
　〃Non；　ma　petite；　not　until　you　hear　me　out。〃
　I　tried　to　raise　my　arms；　not　because　I　thought　I　could　outmuscle　him；　but　because　I　had　to　try。　I've　never　been　able　not　to　struggle　even　when　I　know　it's　a　lost　cause。
　I　was　able　to　raise　my　arms　a　little　　not　enough　to　get　away；　but　enough　to　make　him　bear　down；　enough　to　widen　his　eyes；　enough　to　make　him　tense。　Good　to　know　the　marks　were　helping　me　gain　useful　things　like　strength　and　not　just　crap。
　Blood　was　a　bright　surprise　against　that　pale　skin。　The　blood　dripped　from　an　open　cut　on　his　mouth。　〃How　do　you　know　that　this　is　not　what　all　vampires　would　be　reduced　to　after　years？〃
　I　glared　up　at　him　because　I　couldn't　do　much　else。　〃Liar。〃
　〃How　are　you　so　certain？〃　He　pressed　himself　harder　against　me　for　emphasis　I　think　because　he　wasn't　happy　to　be　there；　his　body　was　all　about　anger　not　sex。　〃How　do　you　know；　Anita？〃
　He'd　used　my　real　name。　〃I'm　a　necromancer；　remember？〃
　His　face　clearly　said　he　didn't　believe　the　answer　was　that　simple；　and　he　was　right。　I　was　remembering　my　visit　to　New　Mexico　and　what　I'd　learned　there。　A　monster　rising　above　the　bar　in　a　club　in　Albuquerque。　It　rose　above　the　bar　in　a　thin　line　of　pale　flesh；　like　the　rising　of　a　crescent　moon；　then　a　face　came　into　view。　It　was　a　woman's　face　with　one　eye　gone　stiff　and　dry　like　some　kind　of　mummy。　Face　after　face　rose　brown　and　withered；　like　a　string　of　monstrous　beads　strung　together　with　pieces　of　body；　arms；　legs；　and　thick　black　thread　like　gigantic　stitches　holding　it　all　together；　holding　the　magic　inside。　It　rose　up　and　up　until　it　towered　against　the　ceiling；　curving　like　a　giant　snake　to　stare　down　at　me。　I　estimated　forty　heads；　more；　before　I　lost　count；　or　lost　the　heart　to　count　anymore。
　There　had　been　another　club　in　that　town；　and　it　had　been　worse　in　some　ways；　because　the　torture　was　part　of　the　entertainment　。。。　Lines　had　appeared　on　the　man's　skin。　The　muscles　under　his　skin　began　to　shrink；　as　though　he　had　a　wasting　disease；　but　what　should　have　taken　months　was　happening　in　seconds。　No　matter　how　willing　the　sacrifice；　it　can　still　hurt。　The　man　started　screaming　as　fast　as　he　could　draw　breath。　His　lungs　were　working　better　than　the　first　man's；　and　he　drew　breath　so　fast；　it　was　like　one　continuous　shriek。　His　skin　darkened　as　it　drew　in　and　in；　like　something　was　sucking　him　dry。　It　was　like　watching　a　balloon　shrivel。　Except　there　was　muscle；　and　when　the　muscle　vanished；　there　was　bone；　and　finally　there　was　nothing　but　dried　skin　over　bones。　And　still　he　screamed。
　The　last　insult；　or　gift；　or　horror；　had　been　the　Master　of　the　City　of　Albuquerque's　power。　Her　power　had　beat　against　me　like　frantic　wings；　birds　crying　that　they've　been　shut　out　in　the　dark　and　they　want　inside　to　the　light　and　the　warmth。　How　could　I　leave　them　crying　in　the　dark；　when　all　I　had　to　do　was　open　and　they　would　be　safe？　I'd　fought　it；　but　in　the　end　the　wings　erupted　into　a　torrent　of　birds。　My　body　seemed　to　open；　though　I　knew　it　didn't。　And　the　winged　things　　only　half…glimpsed　　spilled　into　that　opening。　The　power　flowed　into　me；　through　me；　and　out　again。　I　was　part　of　some　great　circuit；　and　I