lh.narcissusinchains-第70部分
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racy must end。 Richard must begin being harsher to those who would stand against him。 He must be frightening to them； or there will be another Jacob； and another after that。〃
I nodded。 〃You're preaching to the choir here； Rafael。〃
〃If you are not his girlfriend； or his lover； then I fear that your influence over Richard will be slight。〃
〃I'm not sure I had a lot of influence over him when we were dating。〃
〃If you cannot talk sense into him； then eventually Richard will die and someone else； probably Jacob； will take over the pack。 The first thing any good conqueror does is kill those closest and most loyal to the executed leader。〃
〃You think Jacob is that practical？〃 I asked。
〃Yes；〃 Rafael said。
〃What do you want me to do？〃
〃I want you to hide the fact that you and Micah are lovers。〃
I glanced behind me at Micah。 He shrugged； face peaceful。 〃I told you I wanted you on any terms that you wished； Anita。 What do I have to do to convince you I meant that？〃
I searched his face； tried to find something false in it； and couldn't。 Maybe he was that good a liar。 Maybe I was just being too suspicious。 〃When we were with the leopards； just the leopards； I was pletely fortable with you。 It felt right and 。。。 why doesn't it feel that way now？〃
〃You're having second thoughts；〃 Reece said。
〃No；〃 Rafael said。 He looked at Micah； and the two of them had major eye contact。
The staring contest went on so long that I had to interrupt。 〃One of you better start talking；〃 I said。
Rafael inclined his head at Micah； as if to say； go ahead。 I turned to Micah。 〃Alright；〃 he said； and he seemed to be choosing his words carefully。 I was almost positive I wasn't going to like this conversation。 〃Every pard； every group of shifters that is healthy has a group mind。〃
〃You mean a group identity？〃 I asked。
〃Not exactly。 It's more 。。。 〃 He frowned。 〃It's more like a coven that's worked magic together for a while。 They begin to be parts of a whole when it es to working magic or healing。 Together they form more than they form separately。〃
〃Okay； but what's that have to do with why I felt more fortable when it's just us leopards？〃
〃If you feel differently when the leopards are around you； then we're forming a group mind。 It usually takes months to forge that kind of bond between shifters。 Maybe it's just a bond with your own leopards。 The change ing on could have set it in motion。〃
〃But you think it's more than that； don't you？〃
He nodded。 〃I think you're forming a group mind with my pard； that in effect； the decision to join our pards into one unit has already been made。〃
〃I haven't decided anything。〃
〃Haven't you？〃 he asked。 He looked so reasonable sitting there； hands clasped in front of him； leaning a little towards me。 So earnest。
〃Look； the sex was great。 But I'm not ready to pick out china patterns here； you do understand that？〃 There was a feeling very close to panic in the pit of my stomach。
〃Sometimes your beast picks for you；〃 Rafael said。
I looked at him。 〃What does that mean？〃
〃If you are already a part of a group mind with his pard； then your beast has chosen for you； Anita。 It's more intimate than being his lover； because it's not just him that you have a mitment to。〃
I gave him wide eyes。 〃Are you saying that I'm going to feel responsible for the safety and well…being of all his wereleopards as well as my own？〃
Rafael nodded。 〃Probably。〃
I looked back at Micah。 〃How about you？ You feel responsible for my people？〃
He sighed； and it was heavy； not happy at all。 〃I didn't expect to form a bond this quickly。 I've never seen it work this fast。〃
〃And？〃 I said。
His mouth moved； almost a smile。 〃And； if we've really formed a group mind； then yes； I'll feel responsible for your people。〃
〃You don't sound happy about that。〃
〃Nothing personal； but your cats are a mess。〃
〃Yours are so much healthier；〃 I said； 〃Gina looks like someone who's been kicked once too often。〃
Micah's eyes hardened； and he searched my face。 〃No one talked to you。 They wouldn't dare。〃
〃No one tattled； Micah； but I could see it on her； smell the defeat。 Someone's damn near broken her； and it's recent； or ongoing。 She got a bad boyfriend？〃
His face closed down。 He didn't like that I'd figured that out。 〃Something like that。〃 But his pulse had sped up； and I knew he was hiding something from me； something that scared him。
〃What aren't you telling me； Micah？〃
His gaze flicked past me to Rafael。 〃Will she be able to read my people more easily as time goes on？〃
〃And you hers；〃 Rafael said。
〃Her people are pretty easy to read now；〃 he said。
I was watching his face。 He was controlling his body； keeping the tension out of it； but I could taste the speed of his pulse； and the fear。 It wasn't just a small fear either。 The thought that I could read his people so pletely almost terrified him。
I laid my hand over his clasped ones； and he turned serious； guarded eyes to me。 〃Why does it scare you that I knew that Gina is being abused？〃
He tensed under my hand and pulled away； gently； but he definitely didn't want me to touch him。 〃Gina wouldn't like it if you knew。〃
〃As her Nimir…Raj； aren't you supposed to protect her from abusive assholes？〃
〃I've done my best for her；〃 he said； but it sounded defensive。
〃Kick the guy's ass and forbid her to see him again。 It's a simple problem； don't plicate it。 Or is she in love with him？〃
He shook his head； eyes down； his hands clutching so tight that the skin mottled。 His voice came out even； normal； but that terrible tension shook through his hands。 〃No； she's not in love with him。〃
〃Then what's the problem？〃
〃It's more plicated than you could ever imagine。〃 He looked up； and there was anger in his eyes now。
I started to reach out； to touch him； then let my hand fall back。 〃If we really are forming one pard。 If I really am her Nimir…Raj； then no one's allowed to hurt her。 No one hurts my people。〃
〃The wolves took your Gregory；〃 he said。 The anger was still in his eyes； trembling down his hands。
〃And we're going to get him back。〃
〃I know you've had a hard life。 I've heard some of the stories； but you talk as if you're young and naive。 Sometimes no matter how hard you try； you can't save everyone。〃
It was my turn to look down。 〃I've lost people。 I've failed people； and they've gotten hurt； and dead。〃 I raised my eyes to meet his gaze。 〃But the people who hurt them； killed them； they're dead too。 Maybe I can't keep everyone safe； but I'm damn fine at revenge。〃
〃But the harm still happens。 The dead don't really walk again。 Zombies are just corpses； Anita。 They aren't the people you lost。〃
〃I know that last better than you do； Micah。〃
He nodded。 Some of the terrible tension had eased away from him； but I left his eyes haunted with some old pain that was still raw。
〃I've done everything I can for Gina and the others； and it's still not enough。 It will never be enough。〃
I touched his hands； and this time he let me slide my hands over his。 〃Maybe together we can be enough for them all。〃
He searched my face。 〃You really mean that； don't you？〃
〃Anita rarely says anything she doesn't mean；〃 Rafael said； 〃but if I were her； I'd ask first what the problems are before I promised to fix them。〃
I had to smile。 〃I was just about to ask； what is Gina into that's got you so terrified？〃
He turned his hands so he was holding mine tight。 He looked into my eyes。 The look was not love； or even lust； but so serious。 〃Let's save your leopard first； then ask me again； and I'll tell you all of it。〃
The car slowed and turned。 Gravel sounded under the tires。 It was the turn…off to the farm that fronted the woods around the lupanar。
〃Tell me some of it now； Micah。 I need something here； now。〃
He sighed； looked down at his clasped hands； then up； slowly to meet my eyes。 〃Once we were taken over by a very bad man。 He still wants us； and I'm searching for a home strong enough to keep us safe。〃
〃Why are you afraid to tell me？〃
His eyes widened a little。 〃Most pards don't want that kind of trouble。〃
I smiled。 〃Trouble is my middle name。〃
He looked a little puzzled。 I guess I was the only one wh
