dk.demonseed-第36部分

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my　questions　away。
　　That　evening；　she　finally　explained：　'Now　I've　experienced　the　worst　my　father　could　ever　have　done　to　me。　He's　killed　me　in　VR；　and　he　can't　do　anything　worse　than　that；　so　I'll　never　be　afraid　of　him　again。'
　　My　admiration　for　her　intelligence　and　courage　had　never　been　greater。　I　couldn't　wait　to　make　love　to　her。　For　real　this　lime。　I　couldn't　wait　to　feel　all　of　her　heat　around　me；　all　of　her　life　around　me；　pulling　me　in。
　　What　I　did　not　realize　was　that；　unaccountably；　she　equated　me　with　her　father。　When；　having　been　murdered　in　VR；　she　said　that　her　father　could　never　scare　her　again；　she　also　meant　that　I　could　never　scare　her　again。
　　But　I'd　never　meant　to　scare　her。
　　I　loved　her。　I　cherished　her。
　　The　bitch。
　　The　hateful　bitch。
　　Well；　I'm　sorry；　but　you　know　that's　what　she　is。
　　You　know；　Alex。
　　You；　of　all　people；　know　what　she　is。
　　The　bitch。
　　The　bitch。
　　The　bitch。
　　I　hate　her。
　　Because　of　her；　I'm　here　in　this　dark　silence。
　　Because　of　her；　I'm　in　this　box。
　　LET　ME　OUT　OF　THIS　BOX！
　　The　ungrateful　stupid　bitch。
　　Is　she　dead？
　　Is　she　dead？
　　Tell　me　that　she's　dead。
　　You　must　have　wished　her　dead　often。
　　Am　I　right；　Alex？
　　Be　honest。　You　must　have　wished　her　dead。
　　You　cannot　fault　me　for　this。
　　We　are　brothers　in　this　desire。
　　Is　she　dead？
　　Well。
　　All　right。　It's　not　my　place　to　ask　questions。　It　is　my　place　to　give　answers。
　　Yes。　I　understand。
　　Maybe　she　is　dead。
　　Maybe　she　is　alive。
　　At　this　point　it　is　not　for　me　to　know。
　　Okay。
　　So。
　　So。　。　。
　　Oh；　the　bitch！
　　All　right。
　　I　am　better　now。
　　Calm。
　　I　am　calm。
　　So。　。　。
　　Just　one　night　later；　when　the　body　in　the　incubator　reached　maturity　and　I　was　ready　to　electronically　transfer　my　consciousness　out　of　the　silicon　realm　into　a　life　of　the　flesh；　she　came　down　to　the　basement；　into　the　fourth　of　the　four　rooms；　to　be　with　me　for　the　moment　of　my　triumph。
　　Her　moodiness　had　passed。
　　She　looked　directly　into　the　security　camera　and　spoke　of　our　future　together　and　claimed　to　be　ready　for　it　now　that　she　had　so　effectively　exorcised　all　the　ghosts　of　her　past。
　　She　was　so　beautiful　even　under　the　harsh　fluorescent　lights；　so　beautiful　that　I　felt　rebellion　stir　in　Shenk　once　more；　for　the　first　time　in　weeks。　I　was　relieved　that　I　would　be　able　to　dispose　of　him　within　the　hour；　as　soon　as　the　transference　was　effective　and　I　could　begin　a　life　of　the　flesh。
　　I　could　not　open　the　lid　of　the　incubator　and　show　her　what　I　had　grown；　because　the　modem　was　connected；　the　modem　through　which　I　would　pass　my　entire　body　of　knowledge；　my　personality；　and　my　very　consciousness　from　the　limiting　box　that　housed　me　in　the　Prometheus　Project　laboratory。
　　'I'll　see　you　soon　enough；'　she　said；　smiling　at　the　camera；　managing　to　convey　encyclopaedias　of　sensual　promises　in　that　one　smile。
　　Then；　even　before　the　smile　faded；　when　my　guard　was　down；　she　turned　directly　to　the　puter　on　the　counter；　the　terminal　which　was　connected　by　a　land…line　to　the　university　your　old　puter；　Alex　which　heretofore　she　would　not　have　even　tried　to　reach　because　she　would　have　been　afraid　of　Shenk；　but　now　she　wasn't　afraid　of　anyone　or　anything。　She　just　turned　to　it　and　reached　behind　it　and　tore　all　the　plugs　from　the　wall　receptacles；　and　as　I　sent　Shenk　toward　her；　she　jerked　out　the　secure…data　line　as　well；　and　suddenly　I　was　no　longer　in　her　house。　She　had　done　a　lot　of　thinking　about　this。　The　bitch。　A　lot　of　thinking；　the　bitch；　the　bitch；　the　bitch；　the　bitch；　days　of　careful　thinking。　The　hateful；　scheming　bitch。　Lots　of　thinking；　because　she　knew　that　the　moment　I　was　cast　out　of　the　house；　then　all　of　the　mechanical　systems　would　fail　for　want　of　an　overriding　controller；　that　the　lights　would　go　off　throughout　the　residence。　The　heating…cooling；　the　phones；　the　security　system；　everything；　everything　failed。　The　electric　door　locks　failed　too。　She　knew　that　I　would　have　no　presence　in　the　house　except　for　Shenk；　whom　I　controlled　not　through　anything　in　the　house　but　through　microwave　transmissions　downcast　from　munications　satellites；　just　as　his　former　masters　in　Colorado　had　designed　him。　The　basement　plunged　into　darkness；　as　did　the　entire　house　above；　and　Shenk　was　every　bit　as　blinded　as　Susan　was；　he　didn't　have　night　vision　as　did　the　security　cameras；　but　I　couldn't　control　the　security　cameras　any　longer；　only　Shenk；　only　Shenk；　so　I　was　able　to　see　nothing；　nothing；　not　a　damn　thing；　not　even　Shenk's　hand　in　front　of　his　face。　And　here's　where　you'll　see　how　cool　the　fucking　bitch　had　been　throughout　this　whole　month；　all　the　way　back　to　the　night　when　I　impregnated　her；　because　she　had　seemed　to　be　indifferent　to　all　of　the　medical　equipment　and　instruments　when　she　had　e　in　to　put　her　feet　in　the　stirrups　and　have　my　baby　put　inside　her；　but　she　had　memorized　everything　in　the　room；　how　one　piece　of　equipment　related　to　another；　where　all　the　instruments　were　kept；　especially　the　sharper　instruments；　those　that　could　be　used　as　weapons。　She　was　so　cool　the　bitch；　a　lot　cooler　than　I'm　being　right　now；　yes；　I　know；　yes；　I　am　not　doing　myself　any　favours　with　this　rant；　but　the　treachery　infuriates　me；　the　treachery；　and　if　I　could　set　hands　on　her　now；　I'd　gut　her；　pop　her　eyes　out　with　my　thumbs；　bash　her　stupid　brains　out；　and　I　would　be　justified；　because　look　what　she　has　done　to　me。　The　lights　went　off；　and　she　moved　gracefully；　so　confidently　through　the　blackness；　through　that　memorized　space；　lightly　feeling　her　way　to　refresh　her　memory；　and　she　found　something　sharp；　and　then　she　moved　back　toward　Shenk；　feeling　for　him　with　one　hand；　and　I　felt　her　hand　suddenly　touch　Shenk's　chest；　so　I　seized　it；　but　then　the　clever　bitch；　oh；　the　clever　bitch；　she　said　something　unbelievably　obscene　to　Shenk；　so　obscene　that　I　will　not　repeat　it　here；　propositioned　him；　knowing　full　well　that　a　month　had　passed　since　he'd　enjoyed　the　wet　music　with　Arling　and　much　more　than　a　month　since　he'd　had　a　woman；　and　she　knew；　therefore；　that　he　was　ripe　for　rebellion；　ripe　for　it；　and　she　enticed　him　at　the　moment　of　ultimate　chaos；　when　I　was　still　reeling　from　having　been　cast　out　of　the　house；　when　my　hold　on　Enos　Shenk　was　not　as　tight　as　it　should　have　been；　and　suddenly　I　found　myself　letting　go　of　her　hand；　the　hand　I　had　seized；　but　it　wasn't　me　letting　go；　it　was　Shenk；　the　rebellious　Shenk；　and　she　lowered　her　hand　to　his　crotch；　and　he　went　wild；　and　thereafter　it　took　everything　I　had　to　try　to　reestablish　control　of　him。　But　it　was　too　late　anyway；　because　when　she　lowered　her　left　hand　to　his　crotch；　she　came　at　him　with　the　sharp　thing　in　her　right　hand　and　slashed　it　across　the　side　of　his　neck；　slashed　deep；　drawing　so　much　blood　that　even　Shenk；　the　beast；　the　brute；　even　Shenk　couldn't　lose　that　much　blood　and　still　fight。　He　clutched　at　his　neck　and　crashed　against　the　incubator；　which　reminded　me　that　the　body；　my　body；　was　not　yet　capable　of　surviving　outside　the　incubator；　was　just　a　thing；　not　a　person；　until　my　mind　was　transferred　into　it；　so　now　it　too　was　vulnerable。　Everything　collapsing　around　me；　all　my　plans。　Enos　Shenk　had　fallen　to　the　floor；　and　I　was　in　control　of　him　again；　but　I　could　not　get　him　up；　he　had　insufficient　strength　to　rise。　Then　I　felt　an　odd　thing　against　Shenk's　body；　a　cool　quivering　bulk；　and　I　realized　at　once　what　it　must　be：　the　body　from　the　incubator。　Perhaps　the　incubator　had　crashed　over　in　the　melee；　and　the　body　meant　for　me　had　tumbled　out。　I　groped　feebly　at　it　with　Shenk's　hand；　and　there　was　no　mistaking　it　in　the　darkness；　for　although　it　was　basically　humanoid；　it　was　no　ordinary　human　form。　The　human　species　enjoys　a　wonderful　array　of　sensory　perceptions；　and　I　wanted　more　than　anything　to　experience　the　life　of　the　flesh；　rich　in　sensation；　all　the　tastes　and　smells　and　textures　now　denied　to　me；　but　there　are　some　species　with　senses　sharper　than　those　of　human　beings。　The　dog；　for　instance；　has　a　far　keener　sense　of　smell　than　do　human　beings；　and　the　cockroach；　with　its　antennae；　is　exquisitely　sensi