pzb.lostsouls-第50部分

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ther　was　alone；　and　Ghost　left　it　so。　He　watched　as　Ann　walked　away　with　Zillah；　and　when　they　had　gone　several　paces；　he　started　following　again。
　　When　they　got　into　the　black　van；　Zillah　helping　Ann　up　and　motioning　Nothing　in　after　her；　Ghost　thought　it　was　all　over。　Up　Shit　Creek；　Steve　would　have　said；　without　a　paddle。　Now　they　would　drive　away；　and　Ghost　would　have　to　go　back　to　the　club　and　try　to　decide　whether　to　tell　Steve　that　his　ex…girlfriend　had　just　taken　off　with　two　of　their　mysterious　visitors。
　　But　the　headlights　never　came　on；　the　motor　didn't　start。　The　van　didn't　move。　A　few　times　the　back　window　lit　up　with　the　red　flare　of　matches。　Then　the　van　stayed　dark　and　still。　Ghost　walked　closer；　scared　and　confused。　He　didn't　know　what　to　do。　He　wanted　to　go　hammer　on　the　windows；　break　the　glass；　rescue　Nothing　and　Ann　from　that　beautiful；　awful　creature　with　the　bright　green　eyes。
　　But　Nothing　had　cast　his　lot　already；　and　Ann　was　old　enough　to　take　care　of　herself。　If　Ghost　tried　to　rescue　her；　she　would　probably　punch　him　in　the　nose。　So　he　prowled；　and　shivered；　and　wished　for　X…ray　vision　to　see　through　the　sides　of　the　van。　He　closed　his　eyes　and　stood　very　still　with　his　hands　at　his　sides；　swaying；　but　the　van　might　have　been　a　million　miles　away；　might　have　been　empty。　He　couldn't　feel　anything。
　　Ghost　turned　away；　thinking　he　would　go　back　to　the　club。　He　would　keep　his　mouth　shut　if　Steve　was　still　conscious。　He　would　take　Steve　home　and　give　him　a　lot　of　coffee　and　maybe　one　of　Miz　Catlin's　potions。　Maybe　everything　wouldn't　be　so　weird　tomorrow。　He　turned　away；　and　then　he　heard　the　door　of　the　van　slam。
　　Nothing　was　standing　on　the　sidewalk；　half　in　the　street…lights'　glare；　half　in　the　shadow　of　the　storefronts。　He　stood　as　if　he　might　be　very　tired　or　very　drunk；　but　he　held　his　head　up；　and　there　was　strength　in　his　face；　strength　and　stubbornness　and　a　resignation　that　should　never　have　marked　a　face　so　young。
　　〃Hey；〃　said　Ghost　softly。
　　Nothing's　eyes　sharpened；　and　his　lips　parted　a　little。　For　a　moment　he　stared　into　the　darkness；　but　he　didn't　look　as　if　he　cared　much　what　came　out　of　it。　Then　he　saw　Ghost　and　stepped　forward；　and　they　stood　facing　each　other　on　the　cold　sidewalk。
　　〃That's　Steve's　girlfriend　in　the　van　there；〃　said　Ghost。　
　　〃That's　my　lover　in　there　with　her；〃　Nothing　said。　〃She's　on　top　now；　He　was　on　top　before；　when　they　started；　and　the　sweat　on　his　back　was　shining；　and　she　screamed　when　he　spread　her　legs　and　rammed　it　in　。　。　。〃　His　voice　trailed　away；　and　he　stared　at　Ghost。　His　eyes　were　dark　and　huge；　all　pupil。　His　face　was　naked；　exquisitely　shadowed；　desperate。　〃Be　my　brother；〃　he　said。　〃Zillah　loves　me。　He'll　let　me　stay　now。　I　can　stand　it　if　you'll　be　my　brother　just　for　one　minute。〃
　　So　Ghost　put　his　arms　around　Nothing　and　hugged　him　tight；　as　he　had　wanted　to　do　ever　since　he　first　saw　the　pain　in　those　dark　child…eyes。　Nothing　sagged　against　him　as　if　never　wanting　to　let　go　again；　and　Ghost　felt　all　the　exhaustion　in　that　thin　little　body。　There　was　strength　in　this　boy；　a　lot　of　strength；　but　he　was　just　a　kid　and　God　only　knew　what　had　been　happening　to　him。　He　must　have　had　about　all　he　could　stand　for　today。
　　〃Hold　me；〃　said　Nothing　into　the　folds　of　Ghost's　jacket。　〃Please　don't　let　me　go。　Not　yet。〃
　　〃No；〃　Ghost　told　him。　〃Not　yet。　It's　all　right。〃
　　He　felt　so　damn　helpless。　It　wasn't　all　right。　It　would　never　be　all　right。　If　Nothing　stayed　with　those　three；　with　that　one；　he　was　lost。　〃Listen；〃　he　said　into　the　boy's　lank　damp…smelling　hair。　〃Do　you　want　to　e　stay　with　me　and　Steve？　I　mean；　he'll　cuss　about　it；　but　he　won't　kick　you　out。　Not　if　you　need　us。〃
　　Nothing　looked　up　at　Ghost　for　a　second。　Then　be　let　his　head　fall　back　onto　Ghost's　shoulder。　The　touch　of　his　lips　against　Ghost's　throat　was　light；　shivery。　〃I　can't；〃　he　said。　〃If　I　went　home　with　you；　they'd　e　for　me。　Zillah　would。　And　I　have　to　go　with　them。〃
　　〃Why？　What　are　they　to　you？〃　Ghost　knew　his　voice　was　getting　louder；　but　he　couldn't　stop　it。　〃What　the　hell　are　they；　Nothing？　Steve's　pretty　strong；　but　when　that　guy　held　down；　he　couldn't　move。　And　I　dreamed　about　you…or　someone…and　there　was　so　much　blood。　What　are　they？〃
　　〃Never　mind；〃　said　Nothing。　〃Never　mind　what　they　are。
　　This　is　all　you　need　to　know：　whatever　they　are；　so　am　I。〃　
　　〃What　are　you；　then？〃
　　〃I　wish　you　could　toll　me；〃　Nothing　said。　〃I　wish　you　remembered　your　dreams。〃　He　let　go　of　Ghost　and　turned　toward　the　club。
　　But　in　Nothing's　path　was　a　shape　that　stood　tall　and　awry；　blocking　the　sidewalk。　A　scarecrow　with　hair　wild　and　tangled；　shirttails　flapping；　feet　planted　wide　apart　in　a　half…crouch；　knees　bent　at　crazy　angles；　arms　outstretched；　fingers　clawing　at　the　night。　A　shape　that　moved　in　a　cloud　of　beer　and　murder…lust。　Steve。
　　His　eyes　found　Ghost；　wavered；　shone。　〃Where　the　fuck　is　she？　She's　with　a　guy。　I　know　she's　with　a　guy。　I'll　kill　'em　both。　Where　the　fuck…〃
　　The　door　of　the　van　slammed　again。　Ann　was　there；　steadying　herself　with　one　hand　against　the　side　of　the　van。　Her　hair　was　rumpled；　her　face　flushed。　Behind　her；　Zillah　stepped　out；　placing　his　feet　carefully　on　the　sidewalk。
　　Zillah　was　wearing　pink　sneakers；　Ghost　saw。　The　laces　were　printed　with　some　kind　of　bright　pattern…it　looked　like　letters；　but　Ghost　couldn't　make　them　out。　Zillah　looked　at　Nothing　and　smiled　darkly。　Nothing　gave　him　a　shaky　smile　in　return；　a　smile　that　made　Ghost　want　to　cry；　a　smile　that　proved　better　than　anything　else　that　Nothing　was　lost。
　　Steve　looked　from　Zillah　to　Ann。　His　eyes　gleamed；　his　mouth　worked　soundlessly。　〃Ann？〃　he　managed　at　last。　〃You　didn'。。。you　cou'n'　。　。　。
　　Ann　walked　right　up　to　Steve。　She　held　her　head　high　and　her　back　very　straight；　smiled　sweetly　into　his　stricken　face。
　　〃I　could　and　I　did；〃　she　said；　〃and　you　don't　have　a　goddamn　thing　to　say　about　it。〃
　　〃But　he　。　。　。　but　he　。　。　。〃　Wordlessly；　Steve　gestured　at　Zillah；　who　turned　away　smiling。　Ghost　couldn't　tell　whether　Steve　had　noticed　Zillah's　unmarked　face。
　　〃He　was　the　best　lover　I've　ever　had。　He　made　you　look　pretty　sorry。　But　you　don't　need　anyone　to　make　you　look　sorry；　do　you？　You　do　just　fine　on　your　own…or　maybe　with　a　little　help　from　your　bottle。　Why　don't　you　just　get　out　of　my　life；　Steve？　Why　don't　you　just　drink　yourself　into　an　early　grave？〃
　　〃Shut　up；　Ann。〃　Ghost　spoke　mildly；　but　his　face　was　pale；　and　his　hands　were　clenched　into　tight　fists。　He　wondered　how　events　had　managed　to　fall　into　place　this　way；　the　worst　way　anyone　could　imagine。
　　Bad　times　ing；　said　a　voice　in　his　head。　But　they　were　already　here。
　　Ann's　eyes　flickered　to　Ghost。　〃I'm　sorry　you　have　to　see　this；〃　she　told　him。　〃'You're　good；　Ghost；　you　really　are。　You　better　get　away　from　this　loser　before　he　fucks　up　your　life　the　way　he　fucked　up　mine。〃　She　turned　and　walked　away；　back　to　Zillah；　who　was　leaning　against　the　van。　Steve　watched　her　go；　terrible　emotions　warring　in　his　face。
　　Ann　reached　Zillah　and　tried　to　link　her　arm　with　his。　For　a　moment　it　seemed　that　he　would　embrace　her。　But　then　Zillah's　hands　closed　on　her　shoulders；　and　he　gave　her　a　hard　shove　away　from　him。　Ann　staggered；　almost　lost　her　balance　on　the　curb。　Her　head　snapped　back　and　hit　the　side　of　the　van；　and　she　barely　managed　to　keep　her　balance。
　　Zillah　gazed　at　Steve。　His　eyes　were　triumphant。　〃So　sorry；〃　he　said。　〃I　didn't　know　the　slut　belonged　to　you。〃
　　With　a　low；　desperate　cry；　Steve　threw　himself　at　Zillah。　Ghost　grabbed　for　him；　trying　to　catch　Steve's　arm　or　the　back　of　his　shirt；　anything。　He　was　afraid　of　what　Zillah　might　do　to　Steve；　who　was　hurting　worse　than　ever　before；　who　was　too　drunk　to　know　what　he　was　doing。　But　Ghost's　hands　closed　on　air。
　　Steve　lurched　forward。　Zillah's　arm　shot　out；　something　pearly　and　silver　glittering　in　his　hand；　and　Ghost　caught　a　glimpse　of　Zillah's　expression…amused　boredom。
　　Then　Steve　staggered　back；　blood　dripping　down　his　face；　making　dark　flowers　on　his　shirt。　The　razor　had　opened　his　forehead　just　above　the　eyebrows；　and　blood　was　pouring　into　his　eyes；　blinding　him。