tw.theburningman-第3部分

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ummoned　the　strength　to　declare；　'I　am　a　ghost。'
　　　　　　　She　may　have　spoken　of　her　suffering　…　that　she　felt　she　only　clung　to　the　world；　like　a　timid　spirit　that　will　not　take　the　road　to　Heaven；　but　lingers　ever　near　the　places　it　knew。　Certainly　her　last　request　made　it　clear　that　she　had　grown　weary　of　the　circles　of　this　world。　But　I　have　wondered　since　if　there　might　be　some　other　meaning　to　her　words。　Did　she　mean　that　her　own　life　after　my　father's　death　had　been　nothing　more　than　a　ghost…life？　Or　did　she　perhaps　intend　to　say　that　she　had　bee　a　shade　in　her　own　house；　something　that　waited　in　the　dark；　haunted　corridors　of　the　High　Keep　for　her　second　husband's　regard　to　give　it　true　life　…　a　regard　that　would　never　e　from　that　silent；　secret…burdened　man？
　　　　　　　My　poor　mother。　Our　poor；　haunted　family！
　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　I　remember　little　of　the　first　year　of　my　mother's　marriage　to　Lord　Sulis；　but　I　cannot　forget　the　day　we　took　possession　of　our　new　home。　Others　had　gone　before　us　to　make　our　arrival　as　easeful　as　possible　…　I　know　they　had；　because　a　great　tent　had　already　been　erected　on　the　green　in　the　Inner　Bailey；　which　was　where　we　slept　for　the　first　months　…　but　to　the　child　I　was；　it　seemed　we　were　riding　into　a　place　where　no　mortals　had　ever　gone。　I　expected　witches　or　ogres　around　every　corner。　We　came　up　the　cliff　road　beside　the　Kingslake　until　we　reached　the　curtain　wall　and　began　to　circle　the　castle　itself。　Those　who　had　gone　before　had　hacked　a　crude　road　in　the　shadow　of　the　walls；　so　we　had　a　much　easier　passage　than　we　would　have　only　days　earlier。　We　rode　in　a　tunnel　cut　between　the　wall　and　forest。　Where　the　trees　and　brush　had　not　been　chopped　away；　the　Kingswood　grew　right　to　the　castle's　edge；　striving　with　root　and　tendril　to　breach　the　great　stones　of　the　wall。
　　　　　　　At　the　castle's　northern　gate　we　found　nothing　but　a　cleared　place　on　the　hillside；　a　desolation　of　tree　stumps　and　burn…blackened　grass　…　the　thriving　town　of　Erkynchester　that　today　sprawls　all　around　the　castle's　feet　had　not　even　been　imagined。　Not　all　the　forest　growth　had　been　cleared。　Vines　still　clung　to　the　pillars　of　the　shattered　gatehouse；　rooted　in　the　cracks　of　the　odd；　shiny　stone　which　was　all　that　remained　of　the　original　gateway；　hanging　in　great　braids　across　the　opening　to　make　a　tangled；　living　arbour。
　　　　　　　'Do　you　see？'　Lord　Sulis　spread　his　strong　arms　as　if　he　had　designed　and　crafted　the　wilderness　himself。　'We　will　make　our　home　in　the　greatest　and　oldest　of　all　houses。'
　　　　　　　As　he　led　her　across　that　threshold　and　into　the　ruins　of　the　ancient　castle；　my　mother　made　the　sign　of　the　Tree　upon　her　breast。
　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　I　know　many　things　now　that　I　did　not　know　on　the　first　day　we　came　to　the　High　Keep。　Of　all　the　many　tales　about　the　place；　some　I　now　can　say　are　false；　but　others　I　am　now　certain　are　true。　For　one　thing；　there　is　no　question　that　the　Northmen　lived　here。　Over　the　years　I　have　found　many　of　their　coins；　struck　with　the　crude　'F'　rune　of　their　King　Fingil；　and　they　also　left　the　rotted　remains　of　their　wooden　longhouses　in　the　Outer　Bailey；　which　my　stepfather's　workmen　found　during　the　course　of　other　diggings。　So　I　came　to　realize　that　if　the　story　of　the　Northmen　living　here　was　a　true　one；　it　stood　to　reason　that　the　legend　of　the　dragon　might　also　be　true；　as　well　as　the　terrible　tale　of　how　the　Northmen　slaughtered　the　castle's　immortal　inhabitants。
　　　　　　　But　I　did　not　need　such　workaday　proofs　as　coins　or　ruins　to　show　me　that　our　home　was　full　of　unquiet　ghosts。　That　I　learned　for　myself　beyond　all　dispute；　on　the　night　I　saw　the　burning　man。
　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　Perhaps　someone　who　had　grown　up　in　Nabban　or　one　of　the　other　large　cities　of　the　south　would　not　have　been　so　astonished　by　their　first　sight　of　the　High　Keep；　but　I　was　a　child　of　the　Lake　People。　Before　that　day；　the　largest　building　I　had　ever　approached　was　the　great　hall　of　our　town　where　the　thanes　met　every　spring　…　a　building　that　could　easily　have　been　hidden　in　any　of　several　parts　of　the　High　Keep　and　then　never　discovered　again。　On　that　first　day；　it　was　clear　to　me　that　the　mighty　castle　could　only　have　been　built　by　giants。
　　　　　　　The　curtain　wall　was　impressive　enough　to　a　small　girl　…　ten　times　my　own　height　and　made　of　huge；　rough　stones　that　I　could　not　imagine　being　hauled　into　place　by　anything　smaller　than　the　grandest　of　ogres　…　but　the　inner　walls；　in　the　places　where　they　still　stood；　were　not　just　vast　but　also　beautiful。　They　were　shaped　of　shining　white　stone　which　had　been　polished　like　jewellery；　the　blocks　of　equal　size　to　those　of　the　outer　wall　but　with　every　join　so　seamless　that　from　a　distance　each　wall　appeared　to　be　a　single　thing；　a　curving　piece　of　ivory　or　bone　erupting　from　the　hillside。
　　　　　　　Many　of　the　keep's　original　buildings　had　been　burned　or　torn　down；　some　so　that　the　men　from　Rimmersgard　could　pillage　the　stones　to　build　their　own　tower；　squat　as　a　barrel　but　very　tall。　In　any　other　place　the　Northmen's　huge　construction　would　have　loomed　over　the　whole　landscape　and　would　certainly　have　been　the　focus　of　my　amazement。　But　in　any　other　place；　there　would　not　have　been　the　Angel　Tower。
　　　　　　　I　did　not　know　its　name　then　…　in　fact；　it　had　no　name；　since　the　shape　at　its　very　peak　could　scarcely　be　seen　…　but　the　moment　I　saw　it　I　knew　there　could　be　nothing　else　like　it　on　earth；　and　for　once　childish　exaggeration　was　correct。　Its　entrance　was　blocked　by　piles　of　rubble　the　Northmen　had　never　finished　clearing；　and　much　of　the　lower　part　of　its　facade　had　cracked　and　fallen　away　in　some　unimaginable　cataclysm；　so　that　its　base　was　raw　stone；　but　it　still　thrust　into　the　sky　like　a　great　white　fang；　taller　than　any　tree；　taller　than　anything　mortals　have　ever　built。
　　　　　　　Excited　but　also　frightened；　I　asked　my　mother　whether　the　tower　might　not　fall　down　on　us。　She　tried　to　reassure　me；　saying　it　had　stood　for　a　longer　time　than　I　could　imagine；　perhaps　since　before　there　had　even　been　people　living　beside　the　Kingslake；　but　that　only　made　me　feel　other；　stranger　things。
　　　　　　　
　　　　　　　The　last　words　my　mother　ever　spoke　to　me　were；　'Bring　me　a　dragon's　claw。'
　　　　　　　I　thought　at　first　that　in　the　final　hours　of　her　illness　she　was　wandering　in　her　thoughts　back　to　our　early　days　at　the　castle。
　　　　　　　The　story　of　the　High　Keep's　dragon；　the　creature　who　had　driven　out　the　last　of　the　Northmen；　was　so　old　it　had　lost　much　of　its　power　to　frighten；　but　it　was　still　potent　to　a　little　girl。　The　men　of　my　stepfather's　pany　used　to　bring　me　bits　of　polished　stone　…　I　learned　after　a　while　that　they　were　shards　of　crumbled　wall…carvings　from　the　oldest　parts　of　the　castle　…　and　tell　me；　'See；　here　is　a　broken　piece　of　the　great　red　dragon's　claw。　He　lives　down　in　the　caves　below　the　castle；　but　sometimes　at　night　he　es　up　to　sniff　around。　He　is　sniffing　for　little　girls　to　eat！'
　　　　　　　The　first　few　times；　I　believed　them。　Then；　as　I　grew　older　and　less　susceptible；　I　learned　to　scorn　the　very　idea　of　the　dragon。　Now　that　1　am　an　old　woman；　I　am　plagued　by　dreams　of　it　again。　Sometimes　even　when　I　am　awake；　I　think　I　can　sense　it　down　in　the　darkness　below　the　castle；　feel　the　moments　of　restlessness　that　trouble　its　long；　deep　sleep。
　　　　　　　So　on　that　night　long　ago；　when　my　dying　mother　told　me　to　bring　her　a　dragon's　claw；　I　thought　she　was　remembering　something　from　our　first　year　in　the　castle。　I　was　about　to　go　look　for　one　of　the　old　stones；　but　her　bondwoman　Ulca　…　what　the　Nabbanai　called　her　handmaiden　or　body　servant　…　told　me　that　was　not　what　my　mother　wanted。　A　dragon's　claw；　she　explained　to　me；　was　a　charm　to　help　those　who　suffered　find　the　ease　of　a　swift　death。　Ulca　had　tears　in　her　eyes；　and　I　think　she　was　Aedonite　enough　to　be　troubled　by　the　idea；　but　she　was　a　sensible　young　woman　and　did　not　waste　time　arguing　the　right　or　wrong　of　it。　She　told　me　that　the　only　way　I　could　get　such　a　thing　swiftly　would　be　from　a　woman　named　Xanippa　who　lived　in　the　settlement　that　had　sprung　up　just　outside　the　High　Keep's　walls。
　　　　　　　I　was　barely　into　womanhood；　but　I　felt　very　much　a　child。　The　idea　of　even　such　a　short　journey　outside　the　wa