hr.thecarpetbaggers-第142部分

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　〃I　haven't　thought　much　about　it。〃
　〃You　better　start；〃　he　said。　〃It　won't　be　long　now。〃
　She　smiled　at　him。　〃Anxious　to　get　rid　of　me？〃
　〃Don't　be　silly；〃　he　said。　〃The　only　reason　I've　stayed　alive　this　long　is　because　I　didn't　want　to　leave　you。〃
　Something　in　his　voice　made　her　look　searchingly　at　him。　〃You　know；　Charlie；　I　believe　you　really　mean　that。〃
　〃Of　course　I　do；〃　he　snapped。
　Suddenly　touched；　she　came　over　to　the　side　of　his　chair　and　kissed　his　cheek。　〃Hey；　Nurse　Denton；〃　he　said。　〃I　think　you're　breaking　down。　I'll　get　you　in　the　sack　yet。〃
　〃You　got　me　a　long　time　ago；　Charlie。　The　only　trouble　is；　we　didn't　meet　soon　enough。〃
　When　she　thought　about　it；　that　was　true。　The　very　first　time　she'd　e　down　to　have　lunch　with　him　in　the　hospital；　the　day　after　the　operation；　she'd　liked　him。　She　knew　he　was　dying　and　after　a　moment；　she　knew　that　he　knew　it。　But　it　didn't　stop　him　from　playing　the　gallant。　None　of　that　bland；　tasteless　hospital　food　for　him；　even　if　he　couldn't　eat。
　Instead；　the　food　was　rushed　by　motorcar　from　Romanoff's　with　a　police　escort　out　in　front　and　the　siren　blaring　all　the　way。　And　along　with　the　food　came　a　ma？tre　d'　and　two　waiters　to　serve　it。
　He　sat　up　in　his　bed；　sipping　champagne　and　watching　her　eat。　He　liked　the　way　she　ate。　Picky　eaters　were　usually　selfish　lovers。　They　gave　you　nothing；　demanding　the　same　sort　of　unattainable　satisfaction　in　bed　that　they　demanded　from　the　table。　He　made　up　his　mind　instantly；　as　he　always　did。　〃I'm　going　to　be　sick　for　a　while；〃　he　said。　〃I'm　going　to　need　a　nurse。　How　would　you　like　the　job？〃
　She'd　looked　up　from　her　coffee；　her　gray　eyes　quizzical。　〃There　are　nurses　who　specialize　in　home　care；　Mr。　Standhurst。　They'd　probably　be　better　at　it　than　I　am。〃
　〃I　asked　you。〃
　〃I　have　a　job　at　Los　Angeles　General；〃　she　said。　〃A　good　job。　Then　sometimes　I　get　special　calls　to　help　out　here；　like　this　one。　It's　the　kind　of　work　I'm　good　at。〃
　〃How　much　do　you　make？〃
　〃Eighty…five　a　month；　room　and　board。〃
　〃I'll　pay　you　a　thousand　a　week；　room　and　board；〃　he　said。
　〃But　that's　ridiculous！〃
　〃Is　it？〃　he　asked；　watching　her　steadily。　〃I　can　afford　it。　When　the　doctor　left　here　this　morning；　he　told　me　I've　only　got　three　months　to　go。　I　always　expect　to　pay　a　little　bit　more　when　I　can't　offer　a　steady　job。〃
　She　looked　down　as　the　waiter　refilled　her　coffee　cup。　〃You'd　be　here　for　about　three　weeks；〃　she　said。　〃That　will　give　me　time　to　give　notice。　When　do　you　want　me　to　start？〃
　〃Right　now。　And　don't　worry　about　the　notice。　I　already　told　Colton　and　Los　Angeles　General　that　you　were　ing　to　work　for　me。〃
　She　stared　at　him　for　a　moment　then　put　down　her　cup　and　got　to　her　feet。　She　gestured　to　the　ma？tre　d'　and　immediately　the　waiters　began　to　wheel　the　table　out。　〃Hey；　what's　the　idea？〃　Standhurst　asked。
　Jennie　didn't　answer　as　she　walked　to　the　foot　of　the　table　and　picked　up　the　chart。　She　studied　it　for　a　moment　and　then　came　over　and　took　the　glass　of　champagne　out　of　his　hand。　〃If　I'm　working　for　you　now；〃　she　said；　〃it's　time　you　got　some　rest。〃
　
　Time　never　passes　as　quickly　as　when　it's　running　out；　he　thought。　Somehow；　everything　seems　sharper；　clearer　to　the　mind；　even　decisions　are　arrived　at　more　easily。　Perhaps　it　was　because　the　responsibility　for　them　couldn't　e　home　to　roost。　No　one　can　win　an　argument　with　a　grave。
　He　felt　the　pain　race　through　him　like　a　knife。　He　didn't　flinch　but　from　her　face；　he　knew　that　she　knew。　A　strange　kind　of　munication　had　grown　between　them。　Words　weren't　necessary。　There　were　times　he　thought　she　felt　the　pain；　too。
　〃Maybe　you'd　better　go　to　bed；〃　she　said。
　〃Not　just　yet。　I　want　to　talk　to　you。〃
　〃O。K。；〃　she　said。　〃Go　ahead。〃
　〃You're　not　going　back　to　the　hospital；　are　you？〃
　〃I　don't　know。　I　haven't　really　thought　about　it。〃
　〃You'll　never　be　happy　in　a　job　like　that　again。　I've　spoiled　you。　There's　nothing　like　a　lot　of　money。〃
　She　laughed。　〃You're　so　right；　Charlie。　I've　been　thinking　about　that。　Nothing's　going　to　seem　right　ever　again。〃
　He　studied　her　thoughtfully。　〃I　could　leave　you　something　in　my　will；　or　even　marry　you。　But　my　children　would　probably　make　a　federal　case　out　of　it　and　say　you　influenced　me。　All　you'd　get　is　a　lot　of　grief。〃
　She　met　his　gaze。　〃Thanks　for　thinking　about　it；　anyway；　Charlie。〃
　〃You　need　to　make　a　lot　of　money；〃　he　said。　〃Why　did　you　decide　to　be　a　nurse？　You　always　wanted　to　be　one？〃
　〃No。〃　She　shrugged　her　shoulders。　〃What　I　really　wanted　to　be　was　another　Helen　Wills。　But　I　got　a　scholarship　to　St。　Mary's；　so　I　went。〃
　〃Even　being　a　tennis　bum　takes　money。〃
　〃I　know。　Anyway；　it's　too　late　now。　I'd　be　satisfied　if　I　could　just　make　enough　to　hire　the　best　pro　around　and　play　two　hours　every　day。〃
　〃See！〃　he　said　triumphantly。　〃That's　a　hundred　bucks　a　day；　right　there。〃
　〃Yeah。　I'll　probably　end　up　back　at　the　hospital。〃
　〃You　don't　have　to。〃
　〃What　do　you　mean？〃　she　asked；　looking　at　him。　〃That's　all　I　ever　trained　for。〃
　〃You　started　training　for　something　else　long　before　you　studied　nursing。　Being　a　woman。〃
　〃Well；　I　couldn't　have　trained　so　well；　then；〃　she　said　wryly。　〃The　first　time　I　ever　acted　like　a　woman；　I　got　my　head　knocked　off。〃
　〃You　mean　Dr。　Grant　in　Frisco？〃
　〃How　do　you　know　about　that？〃
　〃Mostly　a　guess；〃　he　said。　〃But　the　paper　automatically　checks　up　on　everyone　who　es　near　me。　Grant's　got　that　reputation　and　the　fact　that　you　worked　for　him　and　left　in　such　a　hurry　led　me　to　that　surmise。　What　happened？　His　wife　catch　you？〃
　She　nodded　slowly。　〃It　was　horrible。〃
　〃It　always　is　when　you're　emotionally　involved；〃　he　said。　〃It's　happened　to　me　more　than　once。〃　He　refilled　his　glass　with　champagne。　〃The　trick　is　not　to　bee　emotionally　involved。〃
　〃How　do　you　do　that？〃
　〃By　making　it　pay；〃　he　said。
　〃What　you're　saying；　then；　in　effect；　is　that　I　should　bee　a　whore？〃　she　said　in　a　shocked　voice。
　He　smiled。　〃That's　only　the　Catholic　in　you　that's　talking。　In　the　back　of　your　mind；　even　you　have　to　admit　that　it　makes　sense。〃
　〃But　a　whore？〃　she　said；　her　voice　still　shocked。
　〃Not　a　whore；　a　courtesan　or　its　modern　equivalent；　the　call　girl。　In　ancient　civilizations；　being　a　courtesan　was　a　highly　respected　profession。　Statesmen　and　philosophers　alike　sought　their　favors。　And　it　isn't　only　the　money　that　made　it　attractive。　It's　a　way　of　life　that's　most　plete。　Luxurious　and　satisfying。〃
　She　began　to　laugh。　〃You're　nothing　but　a　dirty　old　man；　Charlie。　When　do　you　bring　out　the　French　postcards？〃
　He　laughed　with　her。　〃Why　shouldn't　I　be？　I　was　a　dirty　young　man；　too。　But　I　was　never　stupid。　You　have　all　the　equipment　necessary　to　bee　a　great　courtesan。　The　body；　the　mind　…　even　your　nurse's　training　won't　be　wasted。　True　sex　demands　a　greater　intellectualism　than　simple　animal　rutting。〃
　〃Now　I　know　it's　time　for　you　to　go　to　bed。〃　She　laughed。　〃Next　thing　I　know；　you'll　be　suggesting　I　go　to　a　school　to　learn　all　about　it。〃
　〃That's　an　idea。〃　He　chuckled。　〃They're　always　after　me　to　endow　one　college　or　another。　Why　didn't　I　think　of　it？　The　Standhurst　College　of　Sex。　Otherwise　known　as　the　Old　Fucking　School。〃　He　began　to　laugh　heartily；　then　suddenly　he　grimaced　in　pain。　His　face　whitened　and　beads　of　perspiration　broke　out　on　his　forehead。　He　hunched　over　in　his　wheel　chair。
　In　a　moment；　she　was　at　his　side；　pushing　up　the　sleeve　of　his　robe；　exposing　his　arm。　Quickly　she　shot　the　syrette　of　morphine　into　his　vein。　His　bony　fingers　gripped　her　arm；　trying　to　push　it　away；　as　he　stared　at　her　with　agony…laden　eyes。
　〃For　Christ's　sake；　Charlie；〃　she　said　angrily。　〃Give　yourself　a　break。　Stop　fighting　it！〃　His　grip　relaxed　for　a　moment　and　she　emptied　another　syrette　into　him。　She　looked　into　his　eyes　and　saw　him　fighting　the　fort　the　drug　would　bring　him。　She　took　his　fragile；　thin　hand　and　raised　it　swiftly　to　her　lips。
　He　smiled　as　the　drug　began　to　cloud　his　eyes。　〃Poor　little　Jennie；〃　he　said　softly。　〃Any　other　time　and　I'd　have　made　you　my　queen！〃　His　fingers　brushed　her　cheek　gently。　〃But　I　won't　forget　what　we　were　talking　about。　I'm　not　going　to　let　you　go　to　waste　just　because　I'm　not　going　to　be　aro