一无所有-第76部分

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ll　be　home　soon　and　well　go　to　mons。　Jiggle　her。　Dap。　Well；　anyway；　you　gee；　she　knew　who　Shev　was；　but　she　wasn't　hateful　or　disapproving；　she　was　very　nice。〃

〃People　do　know　who　he　is；〃　Bedap　said。　〃It's　funny；　because　they　can't　understand　his　books　any　more　than　I　can。　A　few　hundred　do；　he　thinks。　Those　students　in　the　Divisional　Institutes　who　try　to　anize　Simultaneity　courses。　I　think　a　few　dozen　would　be　a　liberal　estimate；　myself。　And　yet　people　know　of　him；　they　have　this　feeling　he's　something　to　be　proud　of。　That's　one　thing　the　Syndicate　has　done；　I　suppose；　if　nothing　else。　Printed　Shev's　books。　It　may　be　the　only　wise　thing　we've　done。〃

〃Oh；　now！　You　must　have　had　a　bad　session　at　PDC　today。〃

〃We　did。　I'd　like　to　cheer　you　up；　Takver；　but　I　can't。　The　Syndicate　is　cutting　awfully　close　to　the　basic　societal　bond；　the　fear　of　the　stranger。　There　was　a　young　fellow　there　today　openly　threatening　violent　reprisal。　Well；　it's　a　poor　option；　but　he'll　find　others　ready　to　take　it。　And　that　Rulag；　by　damn；　she's　a　formidable　opponent！〃

〃You　know　who　she　is。　Dap？〃

〃Who　she　is？〃

〃Shev　never　told　you？　Well；　he　doesn't　talk　about　her。　She's　the　mother。〃

〃Shev's　mother？〃

Takver　nodded。　〃She　left　when　he　was　two。　The　father　stayed　with　him。　Nothing　unusual；　of　course。　Except　Shev's　feelings。　He　feels　that　he　lost　something　essential　—　he　and　the　father　both。　He　doesn't　make　a　general　principle　out　of　it；　that　parents　should　always　keep　the　children；　or　anything。　But　the　importance　loyalty　has　for　him；　it　goes　back　to　that；　I　think。〃

〃What's　unusual；〃　said　Bedap　energetically；　oblivious　of　Pilun；　who　had　gone　sound　asleep　on　his　lap；　〃distinctly　unusual；　is　her　feelings　about　him！　She's　been　waiting　for　him　to　e　to　an　ImportExport　meeting；　you　could　tell；　today。　She　knows　he's　the　soul　of　the　group；　and　she　hates　us　because　of　him。　Why？　Guilt？　Has　the　Odonian　Society　gone　so　rotten　we're　motivated　by　guilt？　。　。　。　You　know；　now　that　I　know　it；　they　look　alike。　Only　in　her；　it's　all　gone　hard；　rockhard　　—dead。〃

The　door　opened　as　he　was　speaking。　Shevek　and　Sadik　came　in。　Sadik　was　ten　years　old；　tall　for　her　age　and　thin；　all　long　legs；　supple　and　fragile；　with　a　cloud　of　dark　hair。　Behind　her　came　Shevek；　and　Bedap；　looking　at　him　in　the　curious　new　light　of　his　kinship　with　Rulag；　saw　him　as　one　occasionally　sees　a　very　old　friend；　with　a　vividness　to　which　all　the　past　contributes：　the　splendid　reticent　face；　full　of　life　but　worn　down；　worn　to　the　bone。　It　was　an　intensely　individual　face；　and　yet　the　features　were　not　only　like　Rulag's　but　like　many　others　among　the　Anarresti；　a　people　selected　by　a　vision　of　freedom；　and　adapted　to　a　barren　world；　a　world　of　distances；　silences；　desolations。

In　the　room；　meantime；　much　closeness；　motion；　munion：　greetings；　laughter；　Pilun　being　passed　around；　rather　crossly　on　her　part；　to　be　hugged；　the　bottle　being　passed　around　to　be　poured；　questions；　conversations。　Sadik　was　the　center　first；　because　she　was　the　least　often　there　of　the　family；　then　Shevek。　〃What　did　old　Greasy　Beard　want？〃

〃Were　you　at　the　Institute？〃　Takver　asked；　examining　him　as　he　sat　beside　her。

〃Just　went　by　there。　Sabul　left　me　a　note　this　morning　at　the　Syndicate。〃　Shevek　drank　off　his　fruit　juice　and　lowered　the　cup；　revealing　a　curious　set　to　his　mouth；　a　nonexpression。　〃He　said　the　Physics　Federation　has　a　fulltime　posting　to　fill。　Autonomous；　permanent。〃

〃For　you；　you　mean？　There？　At　the　Institute？〃

He　nodded；

〃Sabul　told　you？〃

〃He's　trying　to　enlist　you；〃　Bedap　said。

〃Yes；　I　think　so。　　If　you　cant　uproot　it；　domesticate　it；　as　we　used　to　say　in　Northsetting。〃　Shevek　suddenly　and　spontaneously　laughed。　〃It　is　funny；　isn't　it？〃　he　said。

〃No；〃　said　Takver。　〃It　isn't　funny。　It's　disgusting。　How　could　you　go　talk　to　him；　even？　After　all　the　slander　he's　spread　about　you；　and　the　lies　about　the　Principles　being　stolen　from　him；　and　not　telling　you　that　the　Urrasti　gave　you　that　prize；　and　then　just　last　year；　when　he　got　those　kids　who　anized　the　lecture　series　broken　up　and　sent　away　because　of　your　*cryptoauthoritarian　influence*　over　them　—　you　an　authoritarian！　—　that　was　sickening；　unfivable。　How　can　you　be　civil　to　a　man　like　that？〃

〃Well；　it　isn't　all　Sabul；　you　know。　He's　just　a　spokesman。〃

〃I　know；　but　he　loves　to　be　the　spokesman。　And　he's　been　so　squalid　for　so　long！　Well；　what　did　you　say　to　him？〃

〃I　temporized　—　as　you　might　say；〃　Shevek　said；　and　laughed　again。　Takver　glanced　at　him　again；　knowing　now　that　he　was；　for　all　his　control；　in　a　state　of　extreme　tension　or　excitement。

〃You　didn't　turn　him　down　flat；　then？〃

〃I　said　that　I'd　resolved　some　years　ago　to　accept　no　regular　work　postings；　so　long　as　I　was　able　to　do　theoretical　work。　So　he　said　that　since　it　was　an　autonomous　post　I'd　be　pletely　free　to　go　on　with　the　research　I'd　been　doing；　and　the　purpose　of　giving　me　the　post　was　to　—　let's　see　how　he　put　it　—　to　facilitate　access　to　experimental　equipment　at　the　Institute；　and　to　the　regular　channels　of　publication　and　dissemination。'　The　PDC　press；　in　other　words。〃

〃Why；　then　you've　won；〃　Takver　said；　looking　at　him　with　a　queer　expression。　〃You've　won。　They'll　print　what　you　write。　It's　what　you　wanted　when　we　came　back　here　five　years　ago。　The　walls　are　down；〃　

〃There　are　walls　behind　the　walls；〃　Bedap　said；　〃I've　won　only　if　I　accept　the　posting。　Sabul　is　offering　to　。。。　legalize　me。　To　make　me　official。　In　order　to　dissociate　me　from　the　Syndicate　of　Initiative。　Don't　you　see　that　as　his　motive。　Dap？〃

〃Of　course；〃　Bedap　said。　His　face　was　somber。　〃Divide　to　weaken。〃

〃But　to　take　Shev　back　into　the　Institute；　and　print　what　he　writes　on　the　PDC　press；　is　to　give　implied　approval　to　the　whole　Syndicate；　isn't　it？〃

〃It　ought　mean　that　to　most　people；〃　Shevek　said。

〃No；　it　won't；〃　Bedap　said。　〃Itll　be　explained。　The　great　physicist　was　misled　by　a　disaffected　group；　for　a　while。　Intellectuals　are　always　being　led　astray；　because　they　think　about　irrelevant　things　like　time　and　space　and　reality；　things　that　have　nothing　to　do　with　real　life；　so　they　are　easily　fooled　by　wicked　deviationists。　But　the　good　Odonians　at　the　Institute　gently　showed　him　his　errors　and　he　has　returned　to　the　path　of　socialanic　truth。　Leaving　the　Syndicate　of　Initiative　shorn　of　its　one　conceivable　claim　to　the　attention　of　anybody　on　Anarres　or　Urras〃

〃I'm　not　leaving　the　Syndicate；　Bedap。〃

Bedap　lifted　his　head；　and　said　after　a　minute；　〃No。　I　know　you're　not。〃

〃All　right　Let's　go　to　dinner。　This　belly　growls：　listen　to　it。　Pilua；　hear　it？　Rrowr；　rrowrl。〃

〃Hup！〃　Pilua　said　in　a　tone　of　mand。　Shevek　picked　her　up　and　stood　up；　swinging　her　onto　his　shoulder。　Behind　his　head　and　the　child's；　the　single　mobile　hanging　in　this　room　oscillated　slightly。　It　was　a　large　piece　made　of　wires　pounded　flat；　so　that　edgeon　they　all　but　disappeared；　making　the　ovals　into　which　they　were　fashioned　flicker　at　intervals；　vanishing；　as　did；　in　certain　lights；　the　two　thin；　clear　bubbles　of　glass　that　moved　with　the　oval　wires　in　plexly　interwoven　ellipsoid　orbits　about　the　mon　center；　never　quite　meeting；　never　entirely　parting。　Takver　called　it　the　Inhabition　of　Time。

They　went　to　the　Pekesh　mons；　and　waited　till　the　registry　board　showed　a　signout；　so　they　could　bring　Bedap　in　as　a　guest。　His　registering　there　signed　him　out　at　the　mons　where　he　usually　ate；　as　the　system　was　coordinated　citywide　by　a　puter。　It　was　one　of　the　highly　mechanized　〃homeostatic　processes〃　beloved　by　the　eariy　Settlers；　which　persisted　only　in　Abbenay。　Like　the　less　elaborate　arrangements　used　elsewhere；　it　never　quite　worked　out；　there　were　shortages；　surpluses；　and　frustrations；　but　not　major　ones。　Signouts　at　Pekesh　mons　were　infrequent；　as　the　kitchen　was　the　best　known　in　Abbenay。　having　a　tradition　of　great　cooks。　An　opening　appeared　at　last；　and　they　went　in。　Two　young　people　whom　Bedap　knew　slightly　as　dom　neighbors　of　Shevek's　and　Takver's　joined　them　at　table。　Otherwise　they　were　let　alone　—　left　alone。　Which？　It　did　not　seem　to　matter。　They　had　a　good　dinner；　a　good　time　talking。　But　every　now　and　then　Bedap　felt　that　around　them